I'm miserable in college, please help

kurtcobain28
Tue, 09 Sep 2014 01:39:08 +0000

I’m a freshman and I’ve been at college for a little over two weeks and I’ve never been more miserable in my life. My school is pretty big it has like 20,000 undergrad and it’s certainly eclectic but I haven’t met anyone like me. I’ve gone to club meetings, talked to people in my classes, met everyone in my hall, and hung out with them. invited someone to dinner last weekend, etc. So it’s not that I haven’t tried it’s that all the people I’ve met I haven’t connected to. People always tell me to talk to everyone, do activities, be open minded and I’ve been doing that and it hasn’t worked out. I knew coming in here that it’d be hard to find people like me in my age group since I’m mature, I hate social media, I’m eccentric, I can’t do small talk, I can’t stand trivial conversations, etc. I like people who are really deep, like talking about controversial topics, aren’t into social media, don’t conform, are eccentric, mature, etc. I know that it’s much easier finding superficial people than the people I’m looking for but I thought I’d find at least one person who I have the potential to click with and I haven’t. I’ve never felt so hopeless and lost. I want to get away from the meaningless chatter. There are girls I hang out with who keep me included in everything they do but they are not what I’m looking for. I just have no one else. I don’t know what else I can do because I’ve already done everything I can to find people I like and it hasn’t worked. Like are they just going to appear? How on earth am i going to find the people I’m looking for if I haven’t found them anywhere? I feel sick and scared. The thing I want most out of life are meaningful, deep relationships. Everything else seems pointless with out them. I know you can’t become super close to someone in two weeks but I haven’t even met someone who I feel like I have the potential to become super close with. Everyone is the same. No one is like me. I feel like I’m never going to find my place and that there’s nothing left for me anymore. I see a counselor but talking to him won’t make what I want appear. I just feel terrible all the time. I try to be positive and tell myself it takes time but I’m going to be going to the same places everyday and at those places I’ve found no one. I don’t know how to be optimistic anymore. Let me clear some things up before anyone responds. Yes I have to enjoy some trivial things in life and I do, but I don’t want that to be everything, that’s all that I mean. Don’t take anything I say as pretentious. I’m not trying to come off that way and I never do in real life but I’m just stating my feelings here. I know I can’t have an instant group of friends and I know that forming deep relationships takes time, the reason I’m upset is I haven’t met a single person who I have the potential to become close with. I know that conversation starts with small talk and shallow conversation and that’s fine but what I want is to be friends with people who eventually get into deep conversations and have more deep conversations than shallow conversations. But the people I’ve met only have shallow conversations and shy away from deep conversations and that’s what’s upsetting. I’m not trying to find my match, my best friend back home wasn’t my match but she wasn’t superficial and she was mature and we just connected. That’s all I’m looking for. I’m just getting to the point of things so if you take it the wrong way then don’t respond. I’m looking to be helped not lectured.