Is it worth it???

itcannotbetrue
Fri, 13 Nov 2015 15:28:39 +0000

@RoundGenius – I’d like to weigh in here since we recently moved from San Diego County to a bit further North and I know the educational landscape well that you are referring to (e.g., La Jolla Country Day, Parker, etc).

My son is at Choate; we are one of about 15 Southern California families that I know of at the school. He attended a very well-regarded public school district in North County while we lived there. When we made the move further north, I looked for a small, K-8 middle school environment (also public) that is known as a “School of Choice” here in our new district. Definitely not as well-regarded; LPS high schools had much lower scores, but did have the IB diploma programme.

I can tell you the biggest difference that I see, and quite possibly the biggest advantage (and not coincidentally my DS’ biggest struggle) is that kids who attend BS are charged with managing their own destiny. E.g., you will not see what you see in the private school environment of San Diego: the plethora of well-manicured, very fit moms driving their kids from point A to point B for this extra-curricular and that EC, while simultaneously monitoring their online grade accounts 1-2 times a day and then driving them to their private tutors. Instead, these kids need to learn to navigate it on their own. I cannot emphasize the value in this! I have realized how much we were enabling our son, and believe me I was NOT the worst offender in “Svorski Land.” Almost three months into school, my son now:

-Gets to class and other EC obligations ON HIS OWN;
-Picks times when to speak to his teachers ON HIS OWN;
-Gets himself to practices and for various sports and competitive clubs ON HIS OWN
-Has made many blunders? Yes! including earning himself a little “Thursday D” for missing (forgetting?) Community Lunch, lol (he later told us he didn’t like the food served. True).

-But most importantly, he is concerned, on HIS OWN, about his upcoming homework, his grades, his tests, his projects!

To me, this is golden! A 15 YO boy who manages his own schedule? Amazing.

Has it been easy for our family? Honestly, no. It is very, very hard to break my previous “Reminder/Hoverer” ways. In fact, I’ve posted about how much we miss him and how we struggle with communication. However, in the end, we know that the above are exceptional life learning experiences that well-regarded colleges will take into consideration, as they will know that he has already been handling rigor AND has proven to be able to manage his life independently.

Has it been easy on him? Absolutely not. However, slowly but surely, things are coming together for him. And in spite of my worries about his diet (and now skin!), he appears to be getting along, doing well academically, making friends, and enjoying his new-found brand of “Responsible Independence.”

Can your friends with kids at Bishop’s, CC Academy, Parker, etc. claim this for their children? The answer is categorically No. And I do believe the best colleges know this.

I hope that this helps you! Feel free to pm me anytime.