I've had difficulty for three years at a four year university: Need advice

sf9000
Sun, 03 May 2015 15:26:20 +0000

Please note that yes, I know that I messed up my “college career” so far. I take full responsibility for this and realize that it is entirely my fault. However, I just want honest advice moving forward.

Okay, so I’m currently ending my third year of college and it’s been awful. I’m in Computer Engineering, my GPA is right above a 2.0, and I’m like a year behind. I’ve had immense trouble in my classes, even with going to office hours, hiring private tutors, and spending insane amounts of time studying. After having dropped a class for the third(!) time this quarter last weekend after discovering that I did poorly on a midterm (after studying my brains out), I spoke to multiple councilors on campus and have decided that I’m going to need to do something else moving forward. I’ve done some soul searching and determined that these are probably the four reasons I didn’t do well:

-I have a learning disability, and I didn’t properly utilize my accommodations for this. To clarify, I’ve actually had accommodations since freshmen year. However, one of these accommodations was for a reduced courseload, because I learn slowly and have anxiety. I didn’t use this accommodation because I figured I could just succeed if I study way more than anyone else, and I knew that if I used it then I’d be stuck in college for more than four years. Well, this worked out at the beginning of college but it ended up causing me trouble around the time Sophomore year began because I just couldn’t keep up with my coursework or even the professors’ lectures.

-I don’t like my major. Yeah, I know it’s kinda ridiculous that I’ve been in a major I don’t like for three years without changing, but again I accept full responsibility for the situation I’m in. For the first year and a half or so of college I had thoughts that I didn’t really like computer engineering, but I kept telling myself that I’d like it more once I get further in the major and I should just continue. For about the second year and a half I realized and accepted that I disliked computer engineering, but I told myself to continue because I didn’t want to disappoint my family and I wanted the salary that comes with a computer engineering job. And I figured “Well, hopefully I’ll get stuck in something that’s relatively menial, easy, and simple for my field”. After taking some of the upper-division computer engineering courses though I just don’t think I can do this at all. My brain is just not suited to solving logical puzzles, and that’s basically what computer engineering is all about. Some of these concepts just seem impossible for me to wrap my head around even asking the professor dozens of times, and checking my code for errors is just the most tedious and frustrating thing I’ve ever done in my life.

-I don’t really like my college. My university goes on the quarter system, and everything just seems to go by so quickly. One of the councilors I spoke to highly recommends that I switch to a university that goes on a semester system, since she seemed to believe that quarters cause me a lot of difficulty. Additionally, I just don’t like the atmosphere here. Everything seems to go by quickly. And just in general, there’s something I don’t like. I don’t really like it socially either; people are kinda jerks, and they form cliques like it’s high school or something. I don’t really have any close friends; I never talk to anyone in classes and no one tries to talk to me, and while some of my roommates have been cool, others have been jerks, and I always get the impression that they only tolerate me or something. I haven’t joined any clubs or gone to any parties or anything (though I realize I could change that). I also live really close (like, 10 minutes away) to my parents’ home. This was actually a positive for me when I first applied and the major reason I went to this university, since I love my parents so much and wasn’t really ready to live independently. And while I still love my parents a lot, I’m starting to worry that if I can’t get away from them then I’ll never learn to truly become an adult. All of this could be tolerable if I were to just be at this college for another year or two, but if I’m going to change majors then it could take me longer, and I just don’t think I could stand being here. Plus I want to restart my GPA so it’s not so low.

-I have depression. I’ve been depressed since towards the end of Freshmen year, primarily for the other three reasons. Depression just makes it harder to succeed. I know I said that I work hard and study really hard, but sometimes, some weeks or days or quarters, I just don’t have it in me, and I end up laying in bed all day instead. I finally mustered up the courage to see a school psychologist last week (and yes, again, I know it’s my fault for not doing this earlier).

So, all four of the above factors have made it really difficult to succeed. What do you recommend moving forward? The plan I have in mind involves transferring to a community college (assuming I can’t transfer to a four year straight from here, which I don’t think I can with my GPA), changing my major, and then going to a four year college. The only worry I have with this plan is that I could potentially not do well in the CC, and then I’ll be screwed over and end up in an even worse situation than I’m in now. It’s also important to note that while I don’t like my current university, it is generally considered to be a great college that offers lots of job/internship opportunities after graduation, and I’m scared to lose that. In terms of majors I’m kind of considering changing to Accounting. From what I’ve read some people consider it boring, but it seems to involve a lot of arithmetic/algebra, which I’m skilled at and did well in during middle/high school (as opposed to college Calculus, which just confuses the hell out of me). I also know it involves working with spreadsheets and doing work of that nature a lot, and while I know a lot of people find that menial and boring, in my (limited) experience I actually find it kind of soothing and relaxing. I also know that accounting pays decently (though not as well as engineering)/has a lot of job opportunities. If that doesn’t work out I could major in Biology, English, Journalism, or a foreign language (Spanish or Japanese I guess). Does this seem like a good idea, or should I think about a different major? Also, does anyone have any suggestions for the four year college that I could eventually transfer to? I’d like to go somewhere that offers a lot of resources to students like me that have had academic issues, or have some kind of a learning disability (and again, goes on Semester system). I’d also like to go somewhere in Oregon or Washington; I currently live in NorCal, and I like the idea of moving away from my parents and “starting anew,” somewhere, but not too far away from my parents so that I’m across the country or something.

Thanks for the help, anyone who reads this!