Lack of...Willpower? No motivation?

chemmchimney
Mon, 20 Jun 2016 03:43:15 +0000

Hi - I understand how you feel and what a true struggle this can be. Have you had a neuro-psych educational evaluation? An QEEG could also provide some good insight. This testing is expensive but you can have it done privately if your school will not provide it, and private testing is generally more comprehensive. It sounds like you may well have a form of ADHD, a non verbal learning disability (NVLD), a processing delay, active depression or a combination of any of these. Please don’t blame yourself for falling short of your goals - what you describe sounds like it may well be neurologically based, in other words hard-wired. If you find out that you have a learning difference of any kind, testing will indicate what the best path forward may be (therapy, a life coach, medication, changes to your homework etc.) Because you are bright and your grades are decent, your school may not realize how much you are struggling,but if you haven’t already, you should tell your guidance counselor so they can set up some support for you.

I also recommend creating as much structure for yourself at home as you can. In other words set yourself up for success. Do homework in a space with no phone, tv or internet, install apps that will not allow you to surf for a specified period of time, make rules for yourself like if I finish one subject, I “earn” 15 minutes of surfing, then back to the books. You don’t have to deny yourself fun stuff but you need a to-do list and a daily schedule so that you tube doesn’t creep in where it shouldn’t be ( and going cold turkey isn’t a bad idea if you can’t stick to self-imposed limits) You may need to work much harder than others to keep yourself on track and meet your goals which is super frustrating and can feel impossible but your situation will improve if you develop some routines. Exercise, sleep, fish oil and pro biotic supplements, multivitamins, can all help too.

My 15-year-old is very similar to you and I also struggle a lot with the same problems. We are both adhd and her type of adhd also is commonly linked to depression and anxiety. There are a lot of kids just like you! Steven Covey’s books may help you and also possibly “The Distracted Child” Having someone hold you accountable and teach you strategies (a counselor at school who meets with you 2x a week or a tutor at home) may also help. Amen’s ADHD books may also be helpful. Neuro-feedback is helpful too in some cases. There is no cure, but you can improve your coping strategies. Don’t try to fix this all on your own either if you can help it, get some help from someone trained to understand your situation. PM me if you want.