My Roommate Has Social Issues

1Dreamer
Mon, 04 Sep 2017 23:48:33 +0000

Your intentions are good, but you’re looking at it through your own lens. What does he need to improve upon? Being more like you? We’re all different. Introverts and loners aren’t necessarily lonely, being alone isn’t necessarily unhealthy, and socializing more won’t necessarily make them happier.

I think we need to get away from the notion that something is wrong or less healthy about being introverted, and I say this as someone that virtually everyone would describe as very social, outgoing and extroverted, but I’ve never been a lonely person who feels a need to be with or do things with others to be happy and content. I have no problem eating alone, traveling alone, going to a museum alone, etc. I see people who always need to be with or do things with others as possibly having some insecurities about what people will think if they’re seen doing things alone.

I do enjoy being around throngs of people at times including large parties/crowds, music concerts, festivals, etc. The people watching is great and I normally meet people easily wherever I go, but if I feel obligated to interact with others and be the life of the party, I find it draining and usually need time alone to recoup. That’s why I sometimes prefer to do some things alone and go places where I don’t know many people (or anyone), and I can just blend in with the crowd without any expectations, talking with who I want, if and when I want, or not at all. And because I am perceived as being very outgoing, I find it irritating when others assume there must be something wrong when I just want to be left alone.

It’s like every time I try to be helpful or nice in some situations, it never works out or people give me a bad rap about it.

Read that over and really think about it. I think there’s a message there for you.