Need Help! MY UC DAVIS WAITLIST ESSAY!

jbourne
Mon, 26 Mar 2012 17:47:31 +0000

I would add somewhere that you REALLY want to attend UC Davis and that if selected off the waitlist, you will enroll. My essay (and I got in), really just said that - that I would fit in well, always wanted to go there, blah, blah, blah. Good luck to you!

You have some minor grammar errors, if you want to fix them. The main one is the
word ‘antique’ at the end. I don’t think that conveys what you are trying to say:

Davis provides me - Davis would provide me
researches - research
Research Experience for Undergraduate program - the Research Experience
for Undergraduates program
LUX detector - the LUX detector
They will help me a lot - This will help me a lot
Davis community - the Davis community
cross cultural center - the cross cultural center
antique of Chinese culture - not sure what you intend to say here -
maybe ‘uniqueness’ ?? antique is definitely not the right word