Need help withmy personal essay please

maripilicita
Mon, 12 Nov 2012 17:12:37 +0000

would someone give me some advises to improve my essay

My life has become a mixture of unique and amazing adventures which has led to a recipe for character-building. If I set a goal for myself, I will fight for it until it is achieved. In 2011, I attained one such goal; I decided to go on exchange to America, and did. I was so excited to be able to share ideas with people from a different culture, as well as learn from them. I would like to address many of my goals.
First, I wanted to teach them things about me, and acquire information from them as well. I taught salsa dance to the choir class at the school, in which I provided instructions on how to make certain movements. The outcome was really successful, as after my instructions they were able to dance. Additionally, I took the time to teach some people Spanish. I also told them how my home country is different and unique from other countries. Indeed, not only did I share with my new friends about my culture, which allowed me to build strong relationships with them, but I learned things from them, too. Throughout it all, while communicating with my new friends, I was also able to improve my English. I took every correction in my pronunciation and writing as positive criticism. My strong confidence, motivation, has allowed me to learn and share with others. Second, I set a long-term goal for myself of pursuing a career in Biomedical Engineering. As far as I can remember, science has been my passion, especially biochemical structures. My love for science grew fonder the day that I extracted DNA from a grape, a group of friends and I decided to enter in a science contest and demonstrated how using simple procedures can lead to the extraction of DNA. Two weeks later we won the competition and received compliments about our thorough work. The best reward, however, was to be able to apply the knowledge I have received by putting it into practice. I find satisfaction and amazement in knowing that no matter how tiny an organism DNA is present. The decision of studying Biomedical Engineering came after hearing and researching about how scientists are doing incredible research and making unbelievable discoveries in biochemistry, microbiology, and genetics. This is astonishing since it leads to developments that had never been thought before. This career, likewise, applies my two favorite subjects math and biology. They focus on how to create, analyze and design models of living tissues which may improve lives. After graduation, my ambition is to set up a laboratory of cell and tissue engineering, to help save people’s lives. As a final point, I would definitely share all my incoming ideas to help develop new procedures leading to better life standards needed everywhere. Moreover, I hope my knowledge gained might inspire and encourage other Ecuadorians to pursue a career in Biomedical Engineering, likewise studying at Boston University will provide me the opportunity to achieve my short-term and long-term goals.

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