Need some parental advice!

midmo
Thu, 24 Feb 2011 16:10:07 +0000

mikey, another thought, this one less gripey than my previous post. You say that just your father accompanied you to Michigan. Is there any way you can get your mother to go for a visit with you? I know it may seem excessive to her to visit twice, but that is not unusual. If you want to add ‘legitimacy’ to your second trip, line up interviews with the undergraduate program directors of the programs you are interested in, and ask about research opportunities, summer internships and so on.

One of the schools my youngest was interested in is very far away and not so easy to get to. I agreed to take her, but had my fingers crossed on the way there that she wouldn’t like it. She loved it–and so did I. I could easily see her there, and I could see that it was likely to offer some of the things she was looking for. It took being there to change my opinion.

As it happens, she decided to go to Mizzou instead, for a long set of reasons (but not because either of her parents objected). She may well do a semester or year at the remote place, though, because they do have a particular program that fascinates her.

I understand the desire to get away from the familiar, and I support it. However, I also understand that many high school students think their parents are a lot better off, financially, than they really are. And sometimes one parent is more cautious than the other about college expenses, and that can lead to some stress.

I do think you should try to get your mom to Ann Arbor for a visit. If her objection is not based on $$, perhaps seeing you there would give her another perspective.