Now I'm unsure!

Vertigo220h
Tue, 18 May 2010 14:01:31 +0000

And, appropriately, I can’t decide if I should put this in High School Life or in College Life.
Do you know how you go through the motions?
Don’t pay attention to life and then…all of a sudden one day…it just hits you? D:
It hit me today!
I am hella nervous for college. I won’t be living at home for the first time in my life, I won’t have my boyfriend at school, I may not do as well as I did in high school academically. These thoughts are overwhelming!!
I mean, frankly, I have no reputation to keep up. I wasn’t popular in high school, and I’m not expecting to be the bee’s knees in college. I know everybody else is nervous, too, but how could I get over this personally?
My trepidation won’t prevent me from meeting new people, and I think things will smooth over once the school year is over with and I attend the Preview at my school, but today has just put me through the wringer…
I’m actually * scared * for one of the first times in a long, long time. Do you know what I mean? It’s not nervous energy, it’s actual ** fear **…like when I first walked into my Kindergarten class and just wanted to run home.
I don’t know. Sorry for the rant, I just am the calm and composed one in the real world and my family is going through some difficulties. I just can’t let this shatter my composure now.
Any advice is welcomed and appreciated!