Personal Stmt for Law School. BE BLUNT!

Neonzeus
Tue, 01 Feb 2011 06:31:42 +0000

Another attorney parent chiming in - yes, too unfocused and not written clearly. Too much extraneous stuff - (what does your parent’s religion or “well-built” have to do with anything?). Are you trying to excuse your choice of schools based on your parent’s religion, as if Nyack was an awful school or a terrible choice? It isn’t clear what point you’re trying to make in that part of the statement. I also thought the tears stuff was excessively melodramatic. Legal writing needs to be clear and concise. It is seldom required to be emotional.

It wasn’t clear if your interest in immigration law might be derived from the Panamanian student’s immigration status.

It took courage to post here. I think my kid’s first draft was much worse than yours (he also explained an academic turnaround), and he’s doing well in law school now. My kid chose to explain his academic turnaround in a supplemental statement, not in his personal statement. That’s another approach you might want to consider, so that the majority of your personal statement doesn’t feel like it’s about pulling yourself out of holes.

Good luck!