Read my (hopefully) funny supplements

calmom
Sun, 31 Dec 2017 01:48:51 +0000

First of all – I get that your answers are an attempt at humor.

And it can work – my daughter wrote humorous essays and short answers for her apps to Chicago and NYU… but I think that her tone was more charming, as her humor tends to be self-deprecating rather than mocking. Also, my daughter chose a more serious tone for her Barnard essays – and I think that part of it was the nature of the questions asked. For example, NYU had a short answer question that asked something along the lines of, “what did you do last weekend?” - which was something of an opening for an imaginative or humorous answer.

Unfortunately, I agree with the others - your answers aren’t funny – and they don’t really help your application in any way. Instead they come across as sarcastic and suggesting that you don’t really want to attend Barnard at all. “I’d love to spend another year paying ivy-league tuition.” Really?

Barnard is on the upper west side of Manhattan, by the way, not upper east – it’s not clear whether that’s the joke you are trying to make, or whether you really don’t understand the basics of NY and the transit system. (It’s easier to use NY transit north/south than east/west). But it’s just another example of an attempt at humor that would probably fall flat with New Yorkers. (Rather than, say, something tied to life on the upper west side that would resonate).

Here is what Barnard (and all colleges) want in their “why this college” question: They want to know what you will bring to the college, that will benefit them. Why should they choose you over other equally qualified applicants? The first paragraph of your answer is just, “I want, I want” and the second two are essentially wasted space. Instead, focus on why your interest in the 3-2 engineering program makes you a good addition to the Barnard class.

Now obviously you are a high school student so that question can be tricky, but the point is to tie your interests to something you will do, not something that you are asking Barnard to do for you.

And the woman in history to converse with essay could very well be a great vehicle for humor, but yours comes off as mean-spirited.

So I’d suggest taking a step back. Do you really want to attend Barnard? If so, then write an application that will make the admissions committee like you. You can charm with humor, but you can also offend.

And if your “fun” answers are really a reflection that you really are uncertain about whether you would want to attend Barnard…then save yourself the trouble and don’t apply. I mean, why waste your time writing essays that simply provide the ad com with really good reasons to reject you?