Read My Supplement Essay Please!

amcarbonaro
Mon, 30 Jan 2012 23:31:50 +0000

I have decided to apply to the university of Michigan, even though it is extremely close to the deadline. I find this school matches me pretty well. the question is as follows: “Describe the unique qualities that attract you to the specific undergraduate College or School (including preferred admission and dual degree programs) to which you are applying at the University of Michigan. How would that curriculum support your interests? (500 words maximum)” My response is as follows:

"University of Michigan

I remember during the 8th grade, sadly my great grandfather passed away. But as they say, as one door closes, another door opens. And surly it did. For the first and only time, I met my second cousin Tim. Only for a short period, but a period I wont ever forget. Tim was a man of great accomplishments. He embarked through every continent of the world. He climbed Mt. Everest, traveled the Silk Road, and many adventures that people could only dream about. And before he left the funeral home, he told me something that I will carry with me no matter where I end up in life. “Remember this Anthony, while everyone is shooting for the moon, shoot for the stars. That is how you change the world.” And from that point on I’ve always had a desire to achieve something that would change the world for the better. And there is no better place to help me then the University of Michigan College of Literature, Science and the Arts.

The University of Michigan has graduated notable alumni that have changed the world in so many ways. The founder of Google, The father of the iPod, The 38th President of the United States, and even the first man to walk in space graduated from The University of Michigan. I know the College of Literature, Science and the Arts will better my future goals because it will allow me to focus on Computer Science as well as focus on many Entrepreneurial ventures. As a young adult, I strive off the idea that I have been introduced to two fields which correlate together greatly. I have opened my eyes to the world of Entrepreneurship as well as Computer Science by teaching myself both fields. And by applying to LSA I can continue to expand my knowledge beyond my field of study and take what I have learned and apply that to my main goal of changing the world for the better."


Critique it the best you can! Also, Do you think I should write more? Thank You! :)