Should I leave a good school if I'm miserable there?

atomom
Tue, 26 Sep 2017 16:31:19 +0000

Another thought–since you’ve already tranferred once, and you recognize that your discontent is probably more within you than with the school–maybe your expectations of “happiness at college” are unrealistic?

Would you feel better about yourself if you stick it out for 3 1/2 semesters and get the degree from the “bigger name” school? There is nothing wrong with looking forward to vacations/home-cooked meals/ hanging out with high school friends, etc. Most college students feel this way. Maybe high school was “the best time” for you–better than college. It is fine to look back at happy memories. But are you trying to retreat to that comfy home, to recapture/relive that time?
Could unhappiness at both colleges be due to academic stress? Who doesn’t feel better when they are home on break after months of deadlines, papers, projects, and exams? But home will be different when you have college work to do there.
By all means see a counselor . You have the transfer option in hand–that’s great. But before you transfer, examine carefully if this is a path forward or backward. Are you chasing “comfort” or an unreachable “happiness” instead of facing challenges that could strengthen you ?
I say all this because I attended a school that wasn’t a good fit socially, where I was quite discontent a lot of the time. I stuck it out and graduated in 4 years(spent one year abroad). My younger brother was unhappy at the same college. He transferred. Then transferred again, moving back with parents, hanging with hometown friends. Then joined the military. Then finally finished his degree at a 4th college. Both of our paths worked out, but I think my brother could have, more easily, stayed at the first college. He was impatient. And probably unrealistic- -looking for a type of happiness or perfect fit that didn’t exist.