So I love Dartmouth . . .

Mr_Wonderful
Thu, 30 Jul 2009 15:19:23 +0000

HapaGirl,

We will take my DD to campus for freshman orientation / DOC trip in a couple of weeks. She spends her free hours on the internet evaluating all the things that she can do next year (“Look at this! I am so stoked!”). It is just as well she hasn’t learned who her roommate is, or nailed down her first-term classes. This will provide a few more things to speculate about in the coming days.

Your Dad and I are cut from the same cloth. We all have obligations like caring for the rest of the family, retirement, aging parents, etc. Those priorities are shaped by your Dad’s values. He obviously places a high value on providing you with the best opportunities possible. If you are still going through this heart-wrenching agony, then open communication is best. Ask him directly how paying for college fits with your parent’s other responsibilities, and don’t accept an “It’s all good” answer. Lay out your concerns, and let him (them) lay out yours, and it will be easier to find that common ground.