Terrible U Penn Essay please read!

Madshock
Fri, 24 Dec 2010 01:04:35 +0000

“I’m sure not matter where I end up”
I believe you mean “no”* :)

I think you could try adding 1 more sentence at the end and wouldn’t mind, if you have space, for more of a clincher, if you felt like it. Just tie back somehow to the coffee/staying awake thing, whether with a joke or reference or deep insight. This really adds to an essay’s cohesion, and you have no insecurities on coherency if you can tie it all together like that.

As many say on these forums, its also best not to post your essays directly online, as many people will unhesitatingly copy them, and pass them off as your own. It is suggested that you PM your essay to people you trust, so they can review them.