To commute or tough it out

blue0880
Mon, 29 Sep 2014 23:44:20 +0000

I am a first year student at a really great college. I love the campus and my classes. I live 10-15 minutes away from home but I am living on campus. My roommate did not show up on move in day and it took almost 5 lonely weeks until I was able to move in with the girl across the hall. I am a very independent person and I thought I was ready for college and ready to live in a dorm however, I am not happy here at all. I experienced a large burst of homesickness that I never expected.I am not at all usually emotional and I hardly ever cry however, I have cried almost every single day that I have been here. I am from a very close family and I have a boyfriend who is still in high school. It wasn’t all homesickness and alot of it was being very very overwhelmed and lonely. Yes it has gotten a bit easier but I am not sure if living in a dorm is right for me.

Even tho its only been about 6 weeks, I have already learned alot about myself. I know that I really like a schedule and a place to go to at the end of the day. Living on campus, I am not happy. There is no separation between school and everything else. I return at the end of the day to a small room that looks like the rest of the campus. I would much rather live in an apartment or at home as dorms dont really prepare you for the real world. When are you ever again going to have to share this tiny space and bathrooms with a bunch of other people? Sure it teaches you independence but I have been independent for years. The only thing that my parents would do for me was cook my meals and pay the bills. They never had to tell me to do my homework or wake me up for school. I feel like the only reason I would need to live in a dorm is to leave the nest which I am not sure I am ready to leave though I know I will have to at some point. I have been going home every weekend and it gives me something to look forward to throughout the week however, I get really upset on sundays knowing that I have to go back.

Living here isnt horrible but I feel like i have got this idea in my mind that makes it difficult to enjoy college more. I have this feeling that if I live so close, why can’t I just live at home. I also have too much time on my hands that allows me to dwell on this more than I should. My dad works at my college so I could easily come in with him in the mornings and leave at the end of the day. I also realize that I would miss a social aspect but I am already in a few clubs and have a group of friends. I live close enough that someone could easily come pick me up or I could take the bus home. Money isnt a problem as my parents are willing to pay for me to have the “college experience”. I feel like I would do so much better if I computed as I feel that I would focus more on my school work and what I want to do with my life without having to deal with the gross bathrooms and everything else. Many people who know me well from high school including my parents think I need to just stick it out cause I can do it and I think I could but I can’t get that thought out of my head, “why stay here when you can be at home?” Maybe if I went to a school farther away then I would be forced to adjust but I really like my college and dont want to transfer. I’m not saying that I would stay at home forever. I’m thinking that I could trying commuting with my dad for the second half and maybe all of sophomore year while I adjust and focus on finding a major and the live in an apartment or a suite junior and senior year. I have had a lot of mixed reviews on what I should do. My parents tell me to just focus on now and getting through my classes which is good advice but this has really been troubling me and I was wondering what anyone else thought?