UC Personal Statement Prompt 1

itsmichaelxp
Tue, 09 Oct 2012 17:49:50 +0000

Criticize me as much as possible ! any and all feedback will be appreciated!


Describe the world you come from for example, your family, community or school and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.


The world I come from, along with the memories that it contained, never failed to haunt me even as time passed. The world where I come from, and the world I am currently in, can only be drastically compared by the difference of heaven and earth. Born in a small, undeveloped village in Guangdong, China, I have always observed and learned from my family’s struggle to cultivate and sell crops each year to feed the many. Whenever I could, I would always offer to ease my great-grandfather’s back pain by aiding him in the fields. However, he would always smile and refuse, citing repetitively “go enjoy your childhood, you can take over when you grow up!” As these words mesmerized me, I envisioned myself being an adult, following the tracks of my great-grandfather and living his life.
Around my 8th birthday, my great-grandfather took me to visit the nearby city of Guangzhou. As the flashing lights in the urban district enveloped us, we accidently stumbled into a group of men in suits, wearing Communist red armbands. Disgusted by my great-grandfather’s farmer appearance, these men immediately withdrew their laughter and interrogated us of our origin. During each moment of the interrogation, I saw my great-grandfather stutter and quake with fear at the presence of these men. Fortunately, another man emerging from a building abruptly halted the group of men and called them in. After we rushed back home, he explained to me - never disrespect those men in the suits. “But why?” I confronted. “BECAUSE THEY ARE THE REASON YOUR GREAT-GRANDMOTHER IS GONE!” my great-grandfather shouted angrily. Startled by the information, I tried to recall any memory of my great-grandmother. Yes, I have seen countless pictures of her, in photo albums and even on the altars with my ancestors, but not a single living memory of her appeared. Then I finally remembered, standing besides the body of my great-grandmother as the family cried in unison. I had realized that as I unconsciously attended her funeral, I saw my great-grandmother for the very first time. My great-grandfather proceeded to tell me how she was jailed at the accusation of stealing from an event of the Communist Party right before I was born. The judge, jury and executioner principle set by the Chinese had cost her life.
Although years have passed, the vivid image of my great-grandmother’s face never seemed to escape me. Her faded gray hair, wrinkled forehead and kind smile haunts my memory as it motivates me to be an advocator of justice. While Americans mocks the inefficiency of the judicial system, the indirect murder of my great-grandmother by the Communist Party fueled my appreciation for the rule of law and due process. The haunting of my world not only inspired me to appreciate family, but also shaped my dream of becoming a lawyer.