UC transfer personal statement - post, critiques, advice, etc.

fullload
Sat, 31 May 2014 18:30:20 +0000

I’m an English major and published a lot of writing the last 15 years. I wanted to say that first to possibly validate my thoughts. My first thought is, I couldn’t get past the first paragraph. You’re trying WAY too hard here. They want to hear your voice, not the prose of some amateur fiction writer. I know this is not fiction, but it reads like a bad intro to a poorly written novel. I don’t want to discourage you, there’s plenty here to work with. You just need to use your voice to articulate the essentials, stop writing short fiction, and start answering the prompts with a little more clarity and a little less pomp.

Good luck! :)