Weird story, thus weird essay

MaryGJ
Mon, 04 Sep 2017 16:10:54 +0000

Dwelling on what looks like a litany of complaints and excuses makes you look horrible. (not saying you’re right or wrong…frankly, I have no idea if you are… and I’m guessing the first readers for colleges will not either.)

Reading about this…is depressing and offputting and tells absolutely nothing about your ambitions, and nothing positive.

If I were reading this, looking for the key points of essay two…which are: how you overcame an obstacle, succeeded despite it, learned resilience…I’d have a seriously hard time seeing ANY of that in your description.

In fact, you write: “I’m writing about this for prompt #2 on Common app (the hardship one) because this truly was a big hardship to me. It was so stressful to go through all this for 3 years. (I moved for last year because I really couldn’t endure it anymore)”

I don’t think you understand the point of the prompt. The prompt was NOT “identify a hardship in your life and complain about it”…The prompt was NOT “tell us about a time when you were so stressed that you could no longer endure it.”

From a layman’s perspective…what your description says about you…is that when you don’t succeed, you blame others, throw in the towel, and run to a different school…which is exactly the opposite of what this essay is intended to highlight.

That is NOT what you want on your college apps.

It’s pretty clear you’re bitter about this. I’m no expert…your anger might be justified. But college app readers are NOT the people you want trying to sort that out.

College app readers should experience your BEST self. Your application is your sale’s pitch. More offense, less defense. Keep your positives in the spotlight.