Young people are having less sex

alh
Mon, 03 Dec 2018 18:14:49 +0000

Hanna, your perspective is interesting to me. I may live in a bubble.

Among my heterosexual sons, nephews, younger male cousins, young male friends of my sons, sons of my friends, etc … there is a pattern of seeking out and marrying very highly accomplished and driven women. These women all seem to me to have had a choice of mates and picked carefully, sometimes even identifying a particular likely looking prospect and orchestrating an introduction.

Among the highly accomplished young heterosexual female family members and friends, all are partnered but one. She doesn’t seem to be looking, doesn’t want to discuss it, and her parents aren’t clear what exactly is up. She may have a secret life. She is busy with work she loves and seemingly very happy.

I’m very interested in watching what happens with this generation as they begin families of their own, and neither new parent wants to limit career opportunities for childcare. I know more than a couple of sets of grandparents who have been implored to move in and help out. Recently when hearing about a young woman who is doing extremely well professionally, but not making up her mind yet to marry a long term boyfriend, mainly due to his relative lack of ambition and lower career aspirations, I suggested to her dad maybe this was a good thing if dad didn’t want to be asked to be primary caregiver for future grandchildren. Everyone in the extended family likes boyfriend a lot, and they like his family a lot.

Most of my same age peers prioritized time over money, and often professional recognition. Our kids seem to have a different approach, at least so far. It will be fascinating to me to watch what happens with all of them.