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Makin' fr fr friendzzzzzzz!!

NihongoyoNihongoyo 1724 replies530 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 2,254 Senior Member
Hey everyone :)

SO, basically I'm a 3rd (and a half) year transfer student, but I've done the 4 year thing already so I know how it is to wait around and struggle to meet cool people.
But, specifically for Cal, I was wondering how you guys met your friends/if you met cool people? I mean, it's a HUGE school so I don't doubt there are always people that are like you, but...I'm kind of getting overwhelmed the first few days-went to a few social things, and I'm NOT anti-social at all lol, but I felt out of place a little bit. But, I'm still tryin to stay positive and not let this get in the way of the joy I WANT to have :)

ALSO, I'm an lgbt student and was wondering how the "dating" scene is on campus? I want to get involved and might join the Queer Asian club (even though I'm not asian lol), and a few others...thoughts?
edited August 2010
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Post edited by Nihongoyo on
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Replies to: Makin' fr fr friendzzzzzzz!!

  • NihongoyoNihongoyo 1724 replies530 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 2,254 Senior Member
    Nobody!! lol
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  • rider730rider730 2943 replies37 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 2,980 Senior Member
    Well, you asked a bunch of different questions - probably people had th same reaction that I did. Not able to answer the whole set, I went on to the next post.

    People met their good friends a variety of ways, I will list a few and others could chime in.

    Could be a room or suite or floormate.

    In a study group with you.

    Member of same organization, thus similar interests that gets you talking.

    In a DeCal for some mutual passion - Batman or Vampires or some kind of dance or whatever.

    In some long line together and get to talking.

    At same table in a lab or member of a group assigned by GSI

    See someone wearing a shirt or pin for something uncommon, so you talk about it

    Friend of a friend

    Meet at a party

    Meet pulling some prank

    Frat/sorority mate

    Lives in adjacent apartment

    Meet doing laundry

    Basically, you will encounter many people, have acquaintances with lots, know a number well, and have a small number of good friends. It happens without having to force it. The bigness does not make it harder to find friends, it makes it easier because you are bound to have people with complementary interests and personalities due to the sheer numbers. If there were always 10,000 people in a giant room, it would be hard to meet, but clubs, classes, lab tables, study groups - these are small numbers of people at any time. If you are in a group of 20 that are fanatics about making videos, you will do a lot of interacting.

    Cal is a pretty tolerant, diverse and open place. Can't say what the lgbt scene is or how it works out socially, but would assume it is relatively easy to be yourself and to meet people appropriately. Since there are lgbt-related classes and organizations, that is a good way to make contact with fellow students who can answer you with direct experience and recommendations.
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  • ExternalExternal 135 replies35 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 170 Junior Member
    Great list, rider730! I am also a transfer student entering Berkeley and am definitely excited to meet new people. I would suggest joining clubs and organizations because you will meet people with mutual interests.
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  • daynnightdaynnight 287 replies59 discussions- Posts: 346 Member
    Omg you should join the oscar wilde co-op! Lol I'm straight but I went to it and it seems really fun. One kid said he was gay and he loved the co-op because he felt refreshed that there were others like him. :]
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  • OlvidarseOlvidarse 71 replies3 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 74 Junior Member
    Have you heard of QARC (link: http://queer.berkeley.edu/)?
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  • daynnightdaynnight 287 replies59 discussions- Posts: 346 Member
    How come people say they're queer instead of gay or lesbian? What's the difference? And is it rude to ask if someone is gay?
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  • NihongoyoNihongoyo 1724 replies530 discussionsRegistered User Posts: 2,254 Senior Member
    Haha it's fine if you ask them POLITELY!! lol.
    I mean, it all depends on context. If you ask within 2 minutes, it could be weird...but otherwise,idk

    queer = umbrella. Means anything in between straight and guy or all of the above haha. (and trans, gender stuff, etc.)
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  • ItachirumonItachirumon 974 replies42 discussions- Posts: 1,016 Senior Member
    @daynnight I've had people ask me and sometimes they've called me out before they knew. I can think of a few times I got called a cigarette on Xbox Live by a **** and I just replied to the PM with "why yes I am gay, how'd you know? ^__^" great way to disarm someone who might be homophobic by taking away their ability to insult you further. Generally the response I get is a pause and then "Wah...woah.... r-really?" Not saying you'd be a homophobe or anything lol, I'm just sayin'. In general it's not rude if you're polite about it like Jeremy said, and Queer was kinda the...60s-80s term for LGBT people so.. it's kinda changed up since then.
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