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Roommates: what's the best way to approach it!?


Replies to: Roommates: what's the best way to approach it!?

  • kevelyn18kevelyn18 Registered User Posts: 9 New Member
    Thank you. :)
  • mommelehmommeleh Registered User Posts: 303 Member
    Just wanted to second the thoughts of some other posters and present a few tips from our experience.

    Do not think you know someone because you have communicated with them on fb!!! My daughter facebooked with one girl all summer before going away to college. She had plans to meet her when she arrived on campus, and basically said goodbye to her father as soon as he plugged in her computer so she could run off with her new friend. (This was on the opposite side of the country.). No teary goodbye. She was outta there and didn't look back. She met the girl and some others for coffee and couldn't take her for more than 5 minutes. Luckily, this was not her roommate. Her roommate was the complete opposite my daughter, My daughter was sort of alternative, artsy, west-coast chill. The roommate was fake tan, cheerleader type. They had no problems at all living together.

    It seems, from the experiences of many kids, that it is best for your roommate NOT to be your close friend. You want to respect each other and be able to live in a small space. Close friends end up having expectations about going out together etc. If you get in an argument with a friend, it is nice to be able to go to your own 10x12 space and not have to breathe the same air for a while. This is not to say that a roommate can't become a close friend, of course.

    That said, I think it does make sense to try to match up on sleeping hours and approach to partying, if possible. Because, even if you get along famously with someone when you are socializing, you should be able to sleep and study when you want to.

    My two cents :)
  • kevelyn18kevelyn18 Registered User Posts: 9 New Member
    Thank you. That is really what I'm looking for though, is someone who doesn't party and with similar sleeping hours. Since there is no survey I was advised to FB to find someone with those similarities.
  • wis75wis75 Registered User Posts: 13,489 Senior Member
    Dorms are smoke free so the unfortunate few who need to smoke will likely avoid Res Halls. UW stopped any matching questionnaires a long time ago as they found random roommate worked out just as well. Keep in mind that people often tell you what you want to hear. They may exaggerate their lifestyle to seem cool, attractive. Also- college students often change their habits from at home, including sleep times. Everyone is evolving as a person so what someone honestly tells you next summer may not be the case in October after developing college habits.
  • hopefulbadger18hopefulbadger18 Registered User Posts: 38 Junior Member
    Even though smoking isn't allowed in the dorms, keep in mind that a smoking roommate will probably smell like cigarettes and it's likely that their clothing and bedding will too, so despite no smoking in your room, the smell might still bother you if that's what you're trying to avoid, so if you don't go random do very open about your preferences. and wis75 makes a good point, someone who gets up at six for school now might get up at ten for class so they stay up til two, but won't know this until after they make a schedule. Like I said in my past post, pros and cons to everything.
  • billywestybillywesty Registered User Posts: 203 Junior Member
    Agree with many posts...there's no perfect appproach. It's really what you're comfortable with. I did the FB approach and it worked exceptionally well. My roommate and I share similar interests, but we are different. He's from a small Wisc. town, I'm from a large metro area. We both love sports, neither smoke, we both go to parties...light drinkers...never smoke. Our approach to studying is very different although both Dean's list first semester. We didn't try to match sleep schedules but did exchange info to determine respect for each other. As pointed out, your class schedule will determine your sleep schedule, not your preference. As a first semester Freshman, you'll get some crappy class times.....you have to deal with it and that includes sleep and study times.
  • turquoise10turquoise10 Registered User Posts: 17 New Member
    I was just admitted to Wisco a few weeks ago also!!
    I just wanted to make sure you were looking at the right Facebook group though because there are others that aren't the official one that come up if you just look it up in search on Facebook
    if you scroll to the bottom of the page on this look under number 10 where it says request access that will bring you to their official Facebook page Fall Freshman Admitted Student Checklist | UW-Madison Admissions & Recruitment
  • MidwestmomofboysMidwestmomofboys Registered User Posts: 3,729 Senior Member
    billywesty -- congrats on Dean's list!
  • MidwestGirl7MidwestGirl7 Registered User Posts: 42 Junior Member
    Oh cool, I'm really glad that other people are feeling the same way about the party scene. I know that Wisconsin has such a beer culture, so if I go to the school (still haven't decided), I'm also going to actively look for people who don't drink. Which I know is possible, considering how big the school is. Also, Madison is a great school, so there's bound to be nerds -somewhere-

    As for the roommate search, what I've heard is that you can make your search as specific as you want it to be. I know the facebook page is a good place to start/meet people and you can control how specific your criteria is. If you're really looking for a specific type of person, I know that there's also those roommate-matching websites that are similar to online dating websites.
  • rileynelsonrileynelson Registered User Posts: 2 New Member
    I'm having the same problem you are! I want a substance free roommate like me but don't know how to find one. I joined the uw-Madison class of 2017 group and there you find a lot of new freshman concerned about the same thing. Just make sure you join the closed group so you're in the right one. It should be all freshman :) hope that helps! i've been looking but haven't yet found anyone else.
  • Rousse54Rousse54 Registered User Posts: 520 Member
    I believe there is always one Residence Hall each year or maybe more that has a least one floor that is substance free. Check with the Housing Department about which one that will be for this fall. They will know, then find someone who wants to live with you in that hall.
  • MidwestmomofboysMidwestmomofboys Registered User Posts: 3,729 Senior Member
    Also, give the FB group time to expand with more admitted students -- my son's year has 4500 members and housing inquiries picked up in late Feb into March and April.

    While the housing contract is due March 1 (or whatever date specifically for this year), the preference list is not due until May 1 (or whatever specific date for this year) and that is where you request LLC, rank your dorm preferences, and list your roommate if you have found one.
  • EvilcowEvilcow Registered User Posts: 70 Junior Member
    What does substance free really mean? Do they actually allow stuff in the other dorms?
  • Madison85Madison85 Registered User Posts: 10,631 Senior Member
    The other dorms allow students who are 21 or older to have alcohol.

    Here is more about the Substance Free floor in Sullivan:

    Sullivan Hall | University Housing at UW-Madison

    Substance Free House
    Olson House, the top floor (4th) in Sullivan Hall will be the Substance Free House for 2013–14. This entire floor (65 residents) will be a coed community of students who affirm they will not use tobacco, alcohol, or drugs at any time. Select Substance Free House–Sullivan when you submit your preferences online to take part in this experience. Students who list Substance Free House–Sullivan among their top preference choices will get to choose their own room online prior to all other students being assigned. Substance-Free Community Agreement Form.
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