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I posted a similar post in MHC but the thread is dead so I thought I would have luck here
Hi and thanks for stopping by like the title says i'm hoping to transfer into a women's college by Spring 2013.
i'm in the application process now and I've already drawn up a draft of my essay and I would like if someone would take the time to read over and help revise my essay. I really need help in order to stand out because the fact is I have a pretty colorful history when it comes to my transcript I was academically dismissed from one school (no there is no sob story I honestly wasn't focused, I was lazy and I paid for my actions) and I am now attending a CC which I have 3.8 and even with this high g.p.a( well what I would consider to be high) it's going to be really hard for an admissions officer to overlook the academic dismissal from my state school. I need a strong and powerful essay that can stand out and although it will not overlook the academic dismissal it will somehow balance it out...to some degree I hope
I need the most help I can get so I would greatly appreciate if one or more of you guys would be willing to help revise and give harsh criticism if needed on this essay.