So what if you've never heard of my kid's college?

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<ol>
<li> Excuse yourself politely</li>
<li> Head back to the kitchen for another helping of macaroni salad.</li>
<li> Mutter “bless her heart” to yourself under your breath.<br></li>
<li> Grab another glass of sweet tea if steps 1-3 don’t fix your problem (or bourbon if you’ve already been through steps 1-3 multiple times).<br></li>
</ol>