happy1Forum Champion Parents, Forum Champion AdmissionsPosts: 24,586Forum Champion
A few comments...
-- Is it even possible to go to an expensive school? Where will you get the money from? The amount of debt one can take out as a student is very lmiited. Are your parents able to take out a tremendous amount of debt and would they be willing to do so? The money has to come from somewhere. Every year there are people on CC who get themselves into a jam by choosing an unaffordable school and then realizing the money won't just come to them so they have to transfer after a semester or so -- that is a situation you want to avoid. It is not as easy as saying "I'll take out loans" -- you need to have the financing mechanism in place before you consider transferring.
--Have you assessed the practicality of living under a tremendous amount of debt for years and years? You may not be able to take that great job if a boring job pays more and you need the money to repay debt. You may not be able to get a loan for the house or car that you want. The need to repay a huge amount of debt will handcuff your life choices for decades.
--As a commuting student it typically takes a concerted effort and being proactive to make friends and create a life on campus. Have you done everything possible to see out friends at your school? Have you joined clubs? Have you tried to make friends from class? Do you stay at the school during the day or do you just come and go for classes? Have you tried to engage your peers and professors in the architecture department outside of class? And since you are living at home do you have any HS friends around? Have you become active in your community?
--Have you tried to look at the bright side? I understand completely that your situation is not ideal. But try to consider just how many people in the country and throughout the world would do almost anything to have the opportunity to attend a 4 year college in the US and graduate debt free. And you have the chance to study something that you find exciting and that seems to be a great fit for your skill set. Life isn't perfect but try to think of the glass as half full.
-- You may want to seek out counseling at your school. It never hurts to talk things through with a professional. The counselor may have ideas to get your more involved in campus life as well.
--I believe architects need a Masters degree so you may want to stay put for the 4 years of your bachelors degree and then try to upgrade your school when it is time for a masters program. The masters degree will be shorter (hence less debt) and will likely be your terminal degree in the field.
I hope you can work to create a happier life, pursue your profession, and find some peace.
I believe architects need a Masters degree so you may want to stay put for the 4 years of your bachelors degree and then try to upgrade your school when it is time for a masters program. The masters degree will be shorter (hence less debt) and will likely be your terminal degree in the field.
The first professional degree in architecture can be a BArch or MArch (NAAB accredited degrees). Note that BArch programs are five year programs. MArch programs are commonly three year programs, but may be shorter, particularly if the student has a BA/BS in architecture (not NAAB accredited) or BArch.
The OP did not indicate whether s/he is in a BArch program or a BA/BS program in architecture.
There is a difference between blaming the person and saying "there are things you can do to address the issue." The latter is true -- there is plenty that is within OP's abilities to try and improve the situation.
A couple questions ....do you normally have an easy time socially and aren't there some other local people to hang with since you are also still close to home?
Again, even commuter schools have activities or various ways to integrate, including in the dept. If this is one with literally nothing, even profs shutter up after class, then OP may need to find this interaction elsewhere.
I'm sorry you are feeling this, it is hard when the college experience is not what someone once hoped it would be. It is a time for making friends to take forward in life, and although there will be other chances to do this, it is hard to be lonely in college. Have you looked at options where you could transfer and it is in between cheap and expensive? Someone mentioned your in-state schools. Can you tell us what state you are in so we can offer some ideas? Even a couple hours away can feel far - you don't have to go across the country or OOS and pay a lot of money. A lot of kids transfer schools - keep in mind transfer applications are generally due Feb 1st (however the UCs were due Nov 30, so check dates at various schools) so you should be looking into that now and get things rolling over the holidays should you decide that is the right path for you.
I am not advocating transferring or staying, but if you are at all serious about a change, you need to get familiar with the dates and process as part of your overall decision.
One other thing to consider: If you choose to transfer, make sure you won't lose credits along the way. Speaking from observation and experience, transferring in such a way that results in your four year program take five years, no matter the social situation, can be financially unpleasant.
I'm curious why anyone would want to add more debt to student loan debt. Almost every person who graduates will have at least $35,000 in student loan debt. If you are a hard worker and really good at finances, this debt will be fully paid off in 20 years.
So again, do you really want to add more debt onto your future? Unless you are rich or somehow extremely fortunate, don't expect to ever get a good financial loan until after your debt is paid. Things get expensive : )
austinmshauriRegistered UserPosts: 8,716Senior Member
edited December 2017
My son is a commuter. It was difficult for him to connect with people his first semester. He tried different clubs and activities so he stayed busy, but it wasn't until his 2nd semester that he started to really feel at home.
There's nothing wrong with applying to different schools. In the meantime, be as active as you can on your current campus and see how you feel next summer.
I was a commuter during the three years I was at Maryland (where I transferred from a CC, which was as you'd expect a commuter school). I met lots of people there—I worked on campus and joined a couple campus organizations (in one of which I met the person I would eventually marry, in fact). I didn't simply kvetch about being a commuter and decide that that made it impossible for me to meet people.
Every single college out there has a set of sponsored clubs and organizations (and usually a set that aren't officially sponsored), whether it's a commuter college or not. Use them. I don't predict you'll meet your future spouse, but I do feel confident you'll meet friends.
Are you in the Honors program? If not, look quickly for ways in which current stusents can apply (deadlines for spring should be about right now and often require a good GPA and a letter of recommendation from a professor). There's typically an "Honors community" even on commuter campuses.
In addition, can your situation be "not free but cheap", IE., stay at this university where you have free tuition and pay for room/board in one of the living learning communities (if not honors, then one that matches your interests?)
>> Is it better to go to college cheap and miserable, or expensive and in debt? <<
Cheap and miserable is better. Because whether or not you are miserable may largely be up to you. It could very well turn into cheap and happy, with minimal debt. or even cheap and "meh, it's OK" with minimal debt.
Now consider the alternative. You could very well go expensive and in debt -- and STILL wind up miserable. There is absolutely no guarantee that another school with a bigger price tag comes with a pot of happiness at the end of the rainbow. And even if you are happier for a couple of years at a different school -- your new miserable begins as soon as you have to begin paying off that big debt.
Choose cheap, and take advantage of every club, social activity, study group, sporting event, and personal relationship to turn miserable into better and even happy.
Replies to: Is it better to go to college cheap and miserable, or expensive and in debt?
-- Is it even possible to go to an expensive school? Where will you get the money from? The amount of debt one can take out as a student is very lmiited. Are your parents able to take out a tremendous amount of debt and would they be willing to do so? The money has to come from somewhere. Every year there are people on CC who get themselves into a jam by choosing an unaffordable school and then realizing the money won't just come to them so they have to transfer after a semester or so -- that is a situation you want to avoid. It is not as easy as saying "I'll take out loans" -- you need to have the financing mechanism in place before you consider transferring.
--Have you assessed the practicality of living under a tremendous amount of debt for years and years? You may not be able to take that great job if a boring job pays more and you need the money to repay debt. You may not be able to get a loan for the house or car that you want. The need to repay a huge amount of debt will handcuff your life choices for decades.
--As a commuting student it typically takes a concerted effort and being proactive to make friends and create a life on campus. Have you done everything possible to see out friends at your school? Have you joined clubs? Have you tried to make friends from class? Do you stay at the school during the day or do you just come and go for classes? Have you tried to engage your peers and professors in the architecture department outside of class? And since you are living at home do you have any HS friends around? Have you become active in your community?
--Have you tried to look at the bright side? I understand completely that your situation is not ideal. But try to consider just how many people in the country and throughout the world would do almost anything to have the opportunity to attend a 4 year college in the US and graduate debt free. And you have the chance to study something that you find exciting and that seems to be a great fit for your skill set. Life isn't perfect but try to think of the glass as half full.
-- You may want to seek out counseling at your school. It never hurts to talk things through with a professional. The counselor may have ideas to get your more involved in campus life as well.
--I believe architects need a Masters degree so you may want to stay put for the 4 years of your bachelors degree and then try to upgrade your school when it is time for a masters program. The masters degree will be shorter (hence less debt) and will likely be your terminal degree in the field.
I hope you can work to create a happier life, pursue your profession, and find some peace.
The first professional degree in architecture can be a BArch or MArch (NAAB accredited degrees). Note that BArch programs are five year programs. MArch programs are commonly three year programs, but may be shorter, particularly if the student has a BA/BS in architecture (not NAAB accredited) or BArch.
The OP did not indicate whether s/he is in a BArch program or a BA/BS program in architecture.
I am not advocating transferring or staying, but if you are at all serious about a change, you need to get familiar with the dates and process as part of your overall decision.
So again, do you really want to add more debt onto your future? Unless you are rich or somehow extremely fortunate, don't expect to ever get a good financial loan until after your debt is paid. Things get expensive : )
There's nothing wrong with applying to different schools. In the meantime, be as active as you can on your current campus and see how you feel next summer.
Every single college out there has a set of sponsored clubs and organizations (and usually a set that aren't officially sponsored), whether it's a commuter college or not. Use them. I don't predict you'll meet your future spouse, but I do feel confident you'll meet friends.
In addition, can your situation be "not free but cheap", IE., stay at this university where you have free tuition and pay for room/board in one of the living learning communities (if not honors, then one that matches your interests?)
Cheap and miserable is better. Because whether or not you are miserable may largely be up to you. It could very well turn into cheap and happy, with minimal debt. or even cheap and "meh, it's OK" with minimal debt.
Now consider the alternative. You could very well go expensive and in debt -- and STILL wind up miserable. There is absolutely no guarantee that another school with a bigger price tag comes with a pot of happiness at the end of the rainbow. And even if you are happier for a couple of years at a different school -- your new miserable begins as soon as you have to begin paying off that big debt.
Choose cheap, and take advantage of every club, social activity, study group, sporting event, and personal relationship to turn miserable into better and even happy.