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My 11th grade son
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Replies to: My 11th grade son
OP posted “What should I be doing to prepare my 11th grade son for college?”
As I read this post I saw ONLY 2 facts (S and 11th grade) and question about what should OP do now about college. Nothing else was included, nada, zilch, zero. Although I respect OP and S’s privacy, with this extremely limited info, the fact of the matter is everything under the sun could be on the table as to OP's S. Everything! Many people responded with great info (e.g. talk to counselors, take SAT, visit colleges, workshops, net price calculators, college trips, life skills, etc.) I did not intend to scare OP or go off on OP by telling her to send her S to community college. I am simply not as wise as others by being able to draw conclusions from 2 extremely limited facts which is why I posted started by “adding alternatives.”
To OP, I did not intend to scare you or suggest that your S needs to go to a community college (which by the way could still be a viable solution as MORE facts are known). Good luck to you and your S. If I did scare you, I apologize.
Interested or not, they need to take the SAT or ACT in the second half of junior year. If necessary, the parents should tell them to do it or even sign them up.
My older son is the more shy, quiet type. Left to his own devices, who knows when he would have said much to us. Very likely, the entire idea of "going away" was probably a little frightening to a shy 16 year old.
We went on our first official "college tour big trip" junior year (prior to that, we'd seen some schools near family trips.) Before that first big trip, I used the online system to set up all the campus tours, made hotel reservations, and off we went.
One thing that I think helped, is that the first college was selected just to pique interest. We arrived early and went to breakfast at a nearby off-campus hang-out....which seemed to spark more interest for my child. Then we went on the tour, met with admissions, and then before we left, we had an early dinner at another popular off-campus hang-out. From that point on, it was smooth sailing while we visited other campuses. Seeing the young people walking around campus, in the libraries, in the dining halls, and socializing in the off-campus hang-outs was very appealing to my son and he could envision himself being very happy at college.
My DS who is now a senior had some roller coaster grades and needed a strong 2nd semester junior year. I had some schools in mind for the program that he is interested in and just made several spread sheets calculating his GPA in all the different ways that those schools figure it. It made an impression on him to see where he was and where he needed to be to meet the benchmarks for the different levels of merit $$$. It really is the easiest money that a kid will ever earn. He found that motivational enough to really push hard through 2nd semester and it is turning out well for him now. He needed to see the options in a really concrete way, though.
Also, you're not THAT late. Maybe you're like a month late but it's not a big deal. I'd sit your son down and ask him what he would like to do, where he'd like to go...all that fun stuff. He may not know everything right away and that's okay, but you guys can still have an idea of what you're looking for. Next step is to prepare him for SAT and ACT testing. Get some test prep books and register now. The earlier in the spring he take it the better. Don't worry about being rushed too much. I took most of my SAT's in the spring (March and May) so I could have plenty of time to bring it up in the fall of my senior year.
Did he take the PSAT at all? He should have done that if he were interested in NMSF and just at least getting a good idea of how he would do on the exams. If not, it's okay and you can move on straight to the exams but you should get moving on that by January and February. The deadline to register for the next SAT is the 9th but I think you'll have to pay extra for it. If you don't think it's worth the effort and you would like him to prepare for it, you can wait for February.
Following step is to talk finances, scholarships and all that jazz. Depending on how he does on the SAT and ACT, he might be able to earn some merit scholarships. Those really help out in a pinch and make it easier for many families. Run some numbers through colleges' net price calculators so you guys have a good idea of what you can afford. That heavily affects the college selection process.
I wish you the best of luck! Once you proceeded through these steps, you can start visiting schools, going to college fairs, talking with the guidance counselor, and requesting more information from college reps.
But seriously, if he's not motivated about college, don't panic. Lots of juniors, especially boys, just aren't ready at this point to talk about the college search process.
In the spring, have him set up a meeting with his GC (assuming yours is decent) to talk about beginning the search.
Get a copy of the Fiske Guide (do not get him any of the ones that rank schools, such as US News and World Report--those are worthless to a person looking for fit, and they are terrifying!) Leave the guide on his desk or wherever he does his schoolwork. Leave little sticky notes to mark pages of schools you think he'd like. (He will reflexively hate them all, but at least he will open the book and look a bit for himself.)
If he says anything funny or brilliant in the next month or two, say "You know, MelodyA3's Son, that sounds like a great topic for your Common App essay..."
Ask him what date he'd like to take the SAT or ask him if he'd prefer the ACT. Sign him up, then buy one of those study guides. Leave it on his desk next to the Fiske Guide. Also leave out some super sharp pencils.
Good luck.
It is most certainly not too late. Feb. vacation is a great time to visit schools mainly because students aren't on campus in the summer, and fall gets busy.
You'll want to identify some admissions&financial safeties....schools that you know FOR SURE will be affordable and will accept your child.
@saintfan is right that some of us frequently remind people that many schools have Nov and early Dec deadlines for merit scholarship consideration. (and every New Year timeframe we see posts from kids realizing that they desperately need large merit....and it's often too late.
If you're married, discuss with your spouse how much you can realistically contribute each year....and share that with your child.
If your child's parent lives elsewhere, find out if that parent will help pay for college.
He's really pulled his grades up this year, from high 70's to low 90's. He's taking college prep classes, and took the PSATs in the fall.
I'm just a little (???) Type A. So here's how we're approaching the search.
-I went onto Naviance and did a search of schools within about 250 miles that offered his major
- I narrowed down that list by finances; we're both teachers with 2 younger kids. I don't want him to cripple his future with debt. Budget will absolutely play a part in this decision.
- collegedata has a bit more information about admissions-- like the middle 50% SAT scores, and similar info.
- collegenavigator has great info on the percent of freshmen who receive institutional grant money. Some of the schools on my list are initially expensive, but have 97 or 99% of their students receiving an institutional grant. Some also participate in "good neighbor" programs, where they offer a substantial tuition discount to residents of neighboring states. (though I'm sorry to say that few have such an arrangement with NY.)
- Some SAT prep sites offer a free test to help you decide on SAT or ACT. (All the schools on my list take both.) He's taking such a test at Princeton Review in 2 weeks. I believe Kaplan offers a similar test. Santa got him the book "Up your score-- the Underground Guide to the SAT" and "... ACT" books. Personally I think they're among the best books out there for test taking tips. When we know which exam best showcases his talents, we'll sign him up for that exam this spring.
I now have a list of about 16 schools. It includes a column for distance, one for price, one for the odds of getting in, one for the particulars of how they phase his degree, and a big one for pros and cons. He'll happily be choosing from the schools on that list. Surprisingly, few of them are SUNY-- the schools that offer his major tend to be well over 300 miles away. But neighboring states have state universities that are relatively budget friendly.
So far, we've been to 2 of the schools on the list. He LOVED one (it's a bit of a reach; we saw it before getting his PSAT scores) and another he could absolutely see himself and has far better odds of being admitted to. After the second visit (just last week), I realized that he prefers a small school, so that one, with a student body of about 8500, is the largest we'll see. We'll see some over February break, some over Easter. I have some days off coming up soon, so I may consider having him miss one or two days of school to get some more in.
I know we're a LOT less high powered than a lot of the families on this site seem to be. But I'm confident that what I'm doing will help him find the right school.