How personal is too personal??
katens
8 replies7 threadsRegistered User New Member
Hi, so I really want to write a good essay that will give me that extra boost to hopefully get me into a few top schools. I'm worried about what to write without sounding preachy or pretentious or like a sob story.
I'm interested in psychology, and so I had originally wanted to write something about stereotypes and how wrong they can be with what goes on behind the scenes, and how that sort of made me more interested in psychology. I realized though that how I word that may make it seem more like I'm preaching.
So now I'm considering writing about how my parents are divorced and my mom has PTSD from her childhood and how those sort of effected me and made me want to help/pursue psychology.
I also thought about writing about how I have friends with depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorders, and anxiety and how seeing them made me want to be able to help them somehow but not knowing how, made me want to get into psychology.
I may or may not kind of combine those 2 depends on how much space I have or maybe if it would be better to emit some stuff? Idk I just need help. If I write about my mom, I'm nervous about her wanting to read it because she usually reads my writing. Do I write it from a perspective that she would probably be okay with or should I just push the boundaries and not care??
12 replies I'm interested in psychology, and so I had originally wanted to write something about stereotypes and how wrong they can be with what goes on behind the scenes, and how that sort of made me more interested in psychology. I realized though that how I word that may make it seem more like I'm preaching.
So now I'm considering writing about how my parents are divorced and my mom has PTSD from her childhood and how those sort of effected me and made me want to help/pursue psychology.
I also thought about writing about how I have friends with depression, bipolar disorder, eating disorders, and anxiety and how seeing them made me want to be able to help them somehow but not knowing how, made me want to get into psychology.
I may or may not kind of combine those 2 depends on how much space I have or maybe if it would be better to emit some stuff? Idk I just need help. If I write about my mom, I'm nervous about her wanting to read it because she usually reads my writing. Do I write it from a perspective that she would probably be okay with or should I just push the boundaries and not care??
Replies to: How personal is too personal??
Write the Essay No One Else Could Write
"It boils down to this: the essay that gets you in is the essay that no other applicant could write.
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most important thing: write the essay no one else could write.
If someone reading your essay gets the feeling some other applicant could have written it,
then you’re in trouble.
Why is this so important? Because most essays sound like they could have been written by
anyone. Remember that most essays fail to do what they should: replace numbers (SAT/GPA) with the real you.
Put yourself in the shoes of an admissions officer. She’s got limited time and a stack of
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up your essay. Sixty seconds later, what is her impression of you? Will she know something specifically
about you? Or will you still be indistinguishable from the hundreds of other applicants she has been
reading about?"
So you want to make this about you, not your mom or your friends. How much of your essay would you need to spend talking about their problems?
Instead, I suggest thinking about the various experiences in your life thus far and select one that has shaped you just as you are now. Not as a future psychologist but as the person you are at 17.
I suggest you not talk about your parents or your friends or your major. Find a slice of life type of topic that tells something about you- some small incident that helped you grow into the wonderful person your parents and friends adore. Some comment someone made that really helped you grow up or walk in the shoes of another.
Try for Personal, unique and interesting. Something only you could tell. I personally like the idea of having it relate to your major if you can do it cleanly and not forced. Why should the school pick you and what can you contribute to their community?
Plus, show, not just tell. You don't just make claims about others and then state why you want to learn more or major. They're looking for changes you implemented, what that shows about you, your energies, awareness, and activation. Your parents' situation is NOT what gets *you* into colleges.
It's not meant to be expository or have heavy pondering. Just anice little narrative that shows off your positives. It does not need to be unique- there aren't that many topics out there. But how you choose and write matters.
Always difficult, however, to critique an unwritten essay.
More like. what have you learned and done (actially done) that shows you've grown and moved ahead, examples that show you climbed out of your own backstory. . That's not "and now I want x major."
I've read plenty of real essays in apps. They don't guess you must have character because you or your family suffered. Or assume you must really want to help people because you say so...if nothing shows you ever activated. Or what you did do is not relevant to what they need to see.
No idea what colleges OP wants.