PARENTS4PARENTS is a new initiative aimed at highlighting the vast expertise of our parents community while helping other parents better navigate the college admissions process. aggies1989 is a UC alumnus and parent of two UC college kids. ASK HIM ANYTHING!
GUEST STUDENT OF THE WEEK: fintech3753 is a current student at the Wharton School. Majoring in finance, he is hoping to pursue a career at the intersection of finance and technology. ASK HIM ANYTHING!
Make sure to check out our August Checklist for HS Seniors. Consult these quick resources to get you started on the process this month.
As we work to adjust to the current reality, make sure to check out these dedicated COVID-19 resources: our directory of virtual campus tours, our directory of extended deadlines, as well as the list of schools going test optional this fall.
Wills and POAs
Youdon'tsay
19629 replies467 threads Senior Member
in Parent Cafe
I fear this will turn into a huge discussion as things on cc often do, but here goes: Dh and I are finally getting around to doing a will. I know, I know, but better late than never. We aren't rich, don't have tons of complicated finances. Do we need anything besides a will and POA/medical POA from a lawyer?
Also, we have asked our two sons (currently 24 and 27) if they're OK with being executor and/or having POA. They both are good with it, with ds2 having a preference for the POAs. Any reason not to split up these duties and let older ds be the executor of the will and younger ds do the POAs? TIA
68 replies Also, we have asked our two sons (currently 24 and 27) if they're OK with being executor and/or having POA. They both are good with it, with ds2 having a preference for the POAs. Any reason not to split up these duties and let older ds be the executor of the will and younger ds do the POAs? TIA
This discussion has been closed.
Replies to: Wills and POAs
There is no reason why your will needs to be complicated.
I would also be inclined to have one as POA, one as executor, just because each guy has specific strengths that would fit a particular role.
Agree about confirming beneficiary and contingent beneficiaries on all accounts now.
When the spouse dies, then you can change the beneficiaries and POAs as one of the sons.
We had been both listed as POA’s and medical POA’s when my mother was alive. In that case either of us could have used it for medical or financial decisions. We split the work but sometimes we stepped in for each other.
In our will we have both D’s as executors.
The benefit is that you can set up the trust terms as you like, and everything you put into that trust obeys those terms without having to be individually stipulated. For example, what if you leave everything equally to your 3 children but one of your children dies before the latter of you and your spouse? What if that child has children of their own? We wouldn't want those potential future grandchildren left out and as of now, they can't be stipulated on an individual account as a beneficiary because they're not born yet. They can be stipulated on the trust as "benefits convey to surviving child of X".
Since people tend to update wills so infrequently we wanted to cover that base. On those beneficiary forms they have the primary beneficiary as spouse and for the secondary or contingent beneficiary I wrote "see attachment" and the attachment mentions "trustee of trust under the last will and testament of Jane A. Doe fbo (for the benefit of) her children". The lawyer's office printed out a different one for each account.
This kind of stuff makes my head swim so I will update if we run into any problems.
We listed all of our children as POA and medical POA. Decisions sometimes need to be made quickly and if someone is off the grid, I want their sibling to be available.
Sorry about the confusion. I did not infer any wrong doing.
I was just saying normally if you have the lawyer create a living trust, that includes the will and POAs, they might charge you the same amount(or close to it) if you only want the will and POAs.
In the 80's we did have a lawyer in NJ write a will and POAs, it costed us less as we recently created the living trust and updated our will and POAs in CA.
Gotcha, artlovers I have been thinking about a trust. I really need to read up on them. My dad's will stipulates some of the things greenwitch mentions in a trust, such as grandkids take my share if I die before my dad, for instance. I am unclear that a trust is needed for that, but I'll read up. I am hoping this is the first and last will (or whatever) is needed, though that may be wishful thinking.
The main benefit of a trust is avoiding probate. As others have said, a lot of that can be avoided with PODs. But, those alone may not be enough. The value of the estate determines whether probate is necessary, and this will vary by state.
And, yes, I agree with you that this likely shouldn’t be your last time to do your will. Fil died last summer and had not updated his will (also the only one he ever executed) from 1994. He had too many assets titled solely in his name with no POD’s, so probate was not avoided. The pour-over trust his will created was based on the estate tax laws at the time and, while there is nothing inherently wrong with it, we are doing away with it so that everything can be put in a revocable trust for mil. It’s not hard, but it’s requiring some extra steps that could have been avoided. All of that could and should have been taken care of with an update. Thankfully, it’s almost ready to be wrapped up, but it has been nearly a year since he died.
As a community property state, California now allows your home to be transferred PoD/ToD by filing a simple form with the county registrar. This makes it easy for most of a simple estate to avoid Probate (and the need for a Trust/Will). In our case, everything goes to the kids PoD/ToD, so the only things left for Probate are the (old) home furnishings/clothes, which can be donated.
Once one of us dies we'll have a family trust kick in for some of our assets. Terms will be that any withdrawals from that will need signatures from both sons as well as surviving spouse.
Medical POAs will include both sons (now 26 and 29), and we'll set up living will and other documents to be as explicit about our wishes as possible. DH had to make / implement MIL's wish to end nutrition and hydration at the end of her life, and we involved our sons. One of them took some more "are you absolutely sure" time than the other (it didn't hold up the decision), but they both had the same sober, analytic, careful approach to the decision. We told them if they had to face something like this with one of us, to remember that their relationship was the most important consideration in the face of any ambiguity.
"As a community property state, California now allows your home to be transferred PoD/ToD by filing a simple form with the county registrar. "
Can you give us a link to it? I cannot find it on my County's web site, in the recorders office.
https://www.legalzoom.com/articles/top-three-benefits-of-a-living-trust
One of the benefits that most people ignore is that a trust kept your will private. If you file with the county PoD or ToD, those information became public and your Son/Daughter may get unsolicidated offers or proposals from service providers. And if you designate a different inherent from your children/spouse, you will face challenges from your family.
My FIL/MIL Transfered their home to their son many years before their passing and their daughters were not informed. As a result, not only that stired up family fude at that time, but also created tentions among siblings even after their passing. Of course, that is an separate issue.