I’m sure you are on pins and needles wanting to have a headcount, and I can sympathize, but it is perfectly legit to use the time up into the RSVP deadline which is still a week and a half away.
We had this RSVP issue. I sent out a polite email asking those who had not responded to please do so…as we needed to get a final count to the venue. I even said they could just email me. Most got the RSVPs sent. But we had four people who never sent one back. Two came and two didn’t. Sheesh.
7 RSVPs came back in today’s mail. They are all “yes”. So a couple more tables have filled. Hoping for more tomorrow.
I had to text a couple of people but most people were really great. It all works out.
For those whose children have gotten married. Did you preserve the dress. ?
My parents preserved the dress. My D ended up being 8 inches taller than I am. I ended up donating the dress to Angel Gowns. It was in beautiful shape. I do still have my veil.
The only reason we had the dress boxed was that it takes up less storage space than hanging it.
I volunteer at a charity thrift shop. We get donated dresses that have been “preserved” and never opened all the time (because no one uses them again…). I can tell you, the fabric yellows just fine in those preserved boxes, and the fabric (especially lace) becomes dry and brittle.
But a boxed dress sure is easy to store!
My DIL and I decided she ought to have it “preserved” instead of “cleaned” and that was based on being able to box it up and store it safely. Our dry cleaner is some sort of certified wedding dress place. The dress doesn’t leave their possession, and I get to check the dress before they box it up. I think we were quoted $225. Can’t remember, but it wasn’t so much I refused to do it. It will be cleaned, mended, and boxed in acid-free paper.
My dress is 35 yrs old and looks like new, even after being busted out of it’s magic box at some point. DIL and I aren’t sure her dress needs to be preserved…but we could see MOB was working up to having a meltdown over it. MOB thinks the gown is in their tiny apartment but it will live here until they have room.
My nieces sold their dresses in the months after their weddings, as did one SIL. The window of opportunity to do that is very small. Nobody wants an out of date, but not vintage, dress.
Angel Gowns is a wonderful organization!
When I looked Angel Gowns up on line all of the sites I looked at said they were not accepting more dresses right now. And most of the status had been that way for 2 years. Are you aware of ones still taking gowns?
I haven’t heard of any place that is currently accepting new dresses. If you want to gift your dress, I’d suggest posting it on Craigslist or Facebook marketplace for a minimal price, and see if you can connect with a bride who can’t afford new. We did this with most all of the wedding decor and it was quite satisfying. Having a price discourages the re-salers a bit, but I also simply asked if the people had a date yet. The table runners actually went to a local bistro, but I digress.
We left the 150 used once charger plates at our venue. They didn’t have the color we wanted…so we bought them.
Re. The dress…some brides I know made christening gowns from their wedding dresses when they had children. They decided that this was a nicer use than hoping some future child or someone would use their gown for a wedding. I thought that was a nice idea too…if christening is part of your faith.
One bride actually took a class at a sewing shop that was for this specific purpose. She said it was full.
And, another update. Our postal service seems a bit behind. Folks have said they mailed responses two weeks ago and we haven’t gotten them. We returned from a trip last night and found one on the ground below the mailbox, in the street. (Sigh).
We originally mailed to seat 168, the ballroom maximum. As of right now, we won’t meet the minimum. We have 109 and to meet the guarantee/minimum we need 124 guests.
We’ve variously called and texted for RSVP status updates. That’s continuing. It’s completely truthful to say our mail has become unreliable.
We’ve begun going to our B list The bride and groom added 5. The groom’s parents added one. And we have a pending list of 20. I’ve already mailed to the bride/groom’s and the groom’s parents additions. I’m addressing a couple from our list each day.
I’m sure that having a January wedding is part of the reason for the declines. We sent the invitations early, because we knew the holidays would have an impact for some. Our pretty large extended family list has very few declines (one young couple will be traveling, another is getting married next year and feel they can’t fit in one more cross-country trip).
Most of the declines are the groom’s family and friends. There’s a lot of geography to deal with bride grew up and attended college on the east coast so most of her friends and family are within 4 hours. Groom grew up in Mississippi, and they both live in the Pacific time zone now.
The bride and groom will both be here for final planning at Thanksgiving. Can’t wait to see them!
We also have January date but are dealing with a totally different concept of time in the Dominican Republic. They think we are a bit nuts for wanting details now. Final tasting is week of wedding. Details of decor and everything is not done. Details and quote for welcome party are pending. We have a local wedding planner and have to trust is works out. RSVPs are not due for a while yet but some are coming in. Others have called about accommodations, etc. We are trying to plan excursion, buses without confirmed numbers is interesting.
What to wear to a rehearsal dinner? It’s at a Brazilian steakhouse. I am an aunt of the bride, so no role to play in the festivities. Pants and a nice top ok?
yes!
Sounds good to me. Our rehearsal dinners were/will be very casual so unless someone says otherwise, pants and a nice top seem like the right way to go.
We’ve done the shopping and today she chose her dress. She looks beautiful. We knew that it was the one when she put it on.
No date set yet or venue, other than probably next September and here in town. #2D will be helping as the planner (she’s very organized).
Well, I spent the morning proofing digital proofs of the addressed envelopes. I found a few mistakes (mostly of my own making), so I guess it was a good idea. The wedding isn’t until March but FDIL and her mom are on the “let’s get things done early” team. I suspect invitations will go out in early January, about 10 weeks before the wedding.
Did is getting married in March. They mailed the invitations last week. They want to get started on table assignments, etc… And they didn’t want the invites to get mixed up with Holiday cards.
We are dealing with a totally different culture and language and it is confusing sometimes. Wedding is Jan 18th. But when we try to finalize things we get told we are really early. Some things like the tastings and final flowers will be done the week before the wedding when DD returns to the DR and they are fine with that. They are humoring us anyhow on some other things. It is a hybrid between a local and destination wedding. Our side is destination, his is local. The Wedding planner is used to either a resort destination wedding or a local one. Our non-resort combination is different. Also combining traditions and languages.
They are not having a wedding party and no rehearsal. Rehearsal dinner and/or welcome party are not customary there and the wedding planner was a little confused about what I was asking about. Since there is no rehearsal we are sponsoring the welcome cocktail party for all the travelers. The groom did not understand that it included him and his family, too. I know all will be wonderful but it is a little bit of a challenge. See if I am still same when I return 