So this is where we’re at–proposal was at the end of August. Church/reception venue/blocks of hotel rooms have been reserved. Music arranged. Still need to decide on place for rehearsal dinner. (Bride’s mother is in the wedding location, and has offered suggestions). They don’t want a huge rehearsal dinner–it will be the bridal party(and spouses) plus immediate family and a few closer relatives–35ish? Reception will be 150-200.
Bride’s mom flew to where bride/groom live (quite far) to go dress shopping with bride/ friends last weekend. I was texting the bride’s mom after I saw the “I said yes to my dress” post on FB. I thought the bride’s mom would send me a picture of the dress, but she only described it to me. She told me my D/groom’s sister had been consulted by text/photo (about what the groom might prefer) so I texted D (who lives in Europe) to see if she’d text me the photo. And she texted back–“Don’t you want to wait until the wedding?” She hasn’t sent it to me. I don’t care that much, but honestly, if D and the bride’s friends/co-workers/mom have seen it, why can’t I? I’m feeling a bit left out of the fun, but, whatever. . (I looked on the store website, and from the description, I think I’ve got it narrowed down 
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D1 got married in Mexico on Thursday. She is still there and H and I got home last night. Wedding was lovely and Of course I thought she was beautiful! A wedding on the beach with beautiful turquoise water was the perfect backdrop. The on site wedding planner had everything arranged and we just relaxed and enjoyed the day. Done! 
DD has a great relationship with FMIL, so has been sharing pictures with her, no problem. FMIL clearly is keeping ‘the men’ in the dark. DD and FSIL have to talk with photographer about what pictures before and what after. Photographer is a friend, which is a nice help getting what they want and the gal is reasonably pricing things.
A friend’s son didn’t communicate much with his parents - DIL would have shared info but assumed her future H was sharing.
DD, like H, is not a great communicator. I have to pull info out of H and pull info out of DD. For example, I was not told specifically about the betrothal ceremony - I knew they had discussed it with the priest, and I knew we were attending Mass together with the guys wearing sport coats, but was not told that they were having a brief ceremony after church let out. Sending the priest a gratuity check today. It was nice. Fortunately DD2 helped select DD’s attire…
@SOSConcern, while Pope Francis has not spent the past couple of summers in the mountains, his schedule is greatly reduced during July and August. Perhaps you can suggest a framed Papal Blessing that you can request.
Exactly @ECmotherx2 ! I believe I can do well with FSIL’s mother who is like minded with me, and she can influence both her DS and my DD.
My in-laws have a framed Papal Blessing for their 60th and ours for our 35th - got them via a priest who was studying in Rome and offered. He actually also is the priest that officiates at the Cathedral now, and did the betrothal blessing (and is their pastor for marriage prep and for the wedding).
I just try to have some of the poor ideas weeded out early…
I will have to tell DD to guard what she says - she was chiding me for eating a few fries DD2 wasn’t going to eat (I had none prior, as I chose a side salad) - DD sometimes has no social filters (like H who said twice in one sitting with FSIL how stubby his fingers were!) On our drive Saturday, with H and me alone in the car, he talked about it again and I said never mention it to FSIL or in public/with anyone else again…DD2 has extremely long fingers (she is 5’6" but her fingers are as long as H’s who is 6’3"). FSIL is a little shorter than DD, but H is at least socially conscious enough to not make any comments about that…
I am hoping DD2 (MOH) will get DD to do something about her extremely dark hairy forearms - her dress will be lace to the elbows which will make it stand out even more. I will ask DD2 to look at salons to treat DD in the near future as a ‘practice run’. DD says bleaching makes her arms look orange and she has limited attempts at getting this resolved. @mom2collegekids can affirm this is something to be attended to…DD has to hear it from her generation; she is also hyper sensitive because a stupid boy taunted her about it in early elementary school.
So glad we are in syncope with future in-laws
^^ Let’s hope not! 
OMG SOSConcern, is your nurse daughter getting married!? If so, congratulations! You are so blessed!
yes - she graduated in April, did a mission trip with her future H, which delayed her taking her national nursing licensing exam and processing in with the VA Hospital - she starts RN work mid-Dec. Her FH is going active reserves and plans to go back into the Army (her graduated from TAMU 4 years ago and has served as an Army officer for 3 years). So we can order the dress once she starts work and hopefully her FH will secure his re-enlistment. With her VA work, she can move around to where he is and also secure a 20 year retirement. Hope she will also work towards a NP or M-Nsg once they are married. This gal will hopefully listen a little to DD2 who is MOH - she will hopefully take guidance well so the wedding will be well-planned. DD2 is detail oriented; DD1 sometimes is in la la land ‘it will all work out’ - well yes, if it is well planned!
Okay, I’m sure everyone here already thinks D and I are crazy-weird, but I still have to give updates, right? D and FSIL are getting complementary tattoos (upper back) which is one reason they spent so little on rings. They visited D’s favorite artist (from a friend’s recommendation and looking at the artist’s portfolio) last week and it went very well. Next week they visit FSIL’s pick. They want to use the same artist so I hope they can agree and avoid a battle royale over which one to go with.
@doschicos, on the lost art of flower arranging: I think anyone who is artistically inclined (this group does not include me!) could learn flower arranging to at least a talented amateur level if they put the time into it. There must be youtube videos on how to do it because there are youtube videos on pretty much everything.
@1214mom, I don’t know anything about flower norms, but my D will not have many flowers. The ceremony is outdoors, so flowers seem kind of unnecessary. They’ve chose non-floral decorations for the reception tent (mostly provided by the venue which is very nice.) She’ll probably have bouquets for herself and the bridesmaids, but hasn’t even decided on that for sure.
@oldfort, a SIX FIGURE wedding? I need to find my fainting couch. 
@SOSConcern, well you’ve been busy! I’m glad all the dresses worked out so well. I’ve never heard of a betrothal ceremony, but it sounds both meaningful and enjoyable. Also very nice that you get along well with MOG. In my case, I’ve known MOG for longer than D has known FSIL! I’d be cautious with you or your D2 making an issue (even a small one) out of your D’s dark arm hair. If she decides to go “au naturale” you don’t want her to worry what others may be thinking.
@atomom, sounds like a lot of progress has been made. When is the wedding? (I’m sure you’ve said but I can’t remember!) I think you need to text your D back “NO, I do NOT want to wait until the wedding darling daughter!” I was anxious enough to see the bridesmaid’s dresses much less the bride’s. At this point all D has is some fabric and some “kind of like this” pictures from the internet.
@NorthMinnesota, a big congrats to your D and her groom! That sounds like an amazing wedding and I hope they’re enjoying their honeymoon.
@SOSConcern That is wonderful! Sounds like she found a great guy! Best wishes and blessings to you all!
" D and FSIL are getting complementary tattoos (upper back) which is one reason they spent so little on rings."
Did they include a clause “the one who breaks up the engagement or files for divorce will pay for the other’s tat removal plastic surgery” into their prenups?
@snoozn your DD and FSIL sound a bit like ‘free spirits’. Tattoos have become so in the mainstream that if that is what they want - sounds like they are being very together in deciding what they want. DD2 got a small tattoo on the inside of her wrist (which can be covered with a watch) - she said this will be her one and only… I also agree I cannot say any more about DD’s dark and thick forearm hair. If DD2 can’t help her along on trying some thing through a salon, then it just has to be dropped. She is a beautiful gal, tall with great figure; just don’t want a big detractor.
We are very happy for DD and FSIL. They will make a great couple.
@SOSConcern, I would try and not get DD2 involved in the forearm hair. It puts DD2 in an awkward situation, she shouldn’t be in the middle of what you want for DD1.
DD1’s fiancé loves her, all of her. Hairy forearms, no social filters and all.
My S’s fiancé is not like me, I’m a girly girl, wear makeup all the time and am very interested in fashion. My FDIL cares nothing of those things and that’s part of what my S loves about her.
DD2 also wants DD1 to look her best. It is up to her to decide to prompt DD1. Just asking about it…DD1 does agree to get her eye brows shaped. Just don’t want her to regret the look in pictures. But it is up to her.
I am not high maintenance, but will do more for wedding on make up and looking my best.
@snoozn Just so you don’t feel alone here…my D2, who recently had her wedding, did not get any flowers for anything for her wedding.
Ha, a prenup regarding tattoo removal – that would get weird looks from a lawyer! Luckily they aren’t getting each other’s names (or any writing). I guess post-divorce tattoo removal will only be a thing if it brings up bad memories. But how often do you see a tattoo on your back? Problem solved! They certainly are free spirits. Thank goodness I think they are truly right for each other and will stay together forever, but one never knows 100%.
There will be few flowers at my daughters wedding this weekend. Only the bride and her bridal party will have flowers. And that’s it. The men will sport pins that carry the wedding theme. The reception tables will be decorated with more wedding theme elements (flags from their respective countries).
Ha ha, DD2, MOH, found another dress as the one first selected was a little tight under her arms and not falling as nice as the store item which probably got stretched out a little with being tried on and thus also fell nicer…but was no longer available, so she found a great one on sale on Bloomingdale’s -
originally only the 4 was available, but then the 6 was also available, so both are being shipped, separately, for free, and there is free return (Nov 3 - Dec 21).
So worth checking out. I didn’t know Bloomingdale’s is now linked somehow business-wise with Macy’s.
@SOSConcern Very elegant dress with the beading. I like it.
That is a very pretty dress, SOS.
A side note - I believe Macy’s and Bloomies have the same ownership. Just wish I could use my Macy’s coupons at Bloomies!