<p>My D asked a lot of tour guides what other schools they considered. She found it very, very helpful to hear why they decided on the school they were at. They could decide how much they wanted to disclose, and some of them very understandably explained only why this school was the right fit for them. When they said how they chose among other specific schools, she learned a lot about what would appeal to a person with a certain set of tastes and goals. If you do it right, it can be very helpful and not insulting.</p>
<p>This is a fun thread - but I wanted to remark seriously on this point because it is a very interesting way to figure out how the fit might work for your particular kid.</p>
<p>I think ‘where else did you apply’ is perhaps a bit blunt, but I actually rather like the question ‘what were some of the other schools you considered, and how did you end up here?’ It’s not the sort of question that’s best asked in the middle of a tour, I don’t think, but if you can get a private moment with the tour guide, or any other student for that matter, I think that query can be informative.</p>
<p>That sounds weird to my native born NYC self who grew up less than 10 blocks from the NYU campus and remembered when it was the fallback school for average/mediocre well-off tri-state area kids. </p>
<p>Back when I attended high school in the early-mid '90s…if one received acceptances to UMich and NYU…it was a no-brainer…UMich. Far better academics/prestige…and oftentimes…better FA/scholarship money even as OOS.</p>
<p>“Find a personal connection at the school” - That helps a lot, and it’s great if possible. At one college Iunintentionally (and thankfully) made a connection when looking at a list of corporate scholarship winners. I contacted the Dad for college feedback, and he suggested we arrange a meeting with his D on our tour day. She was very busy, so it was only a short time while she gulped down her lunch. But we learned a lot!</p>
<p>I was supposed to take my daughter to a college open house day in December in the Northeast. However, we didn’t go because of bad weather, but the college didn’t cancel it. We went a couple months later and our tour guide was talking about how horrible it was to try to give a walking tour of the college at that open house - in a hailstorm.</p>
<p>“I actually rather like the question ‘what were some of the other schools you considered, and how did you end up here?’”</p>
<p>Me too. If you phrase it right, this is a good question to ask whether you’re in an educational search or a job search. I often asked, “What factors were you thinking about when you decided to come here?” You can find out a lot about what that person thinks the important up sides are.</p>
<p>Hanna, exactly why I thought it was a great question. Yes, I also asked the question privately while some of the others were taking a rest and trying to catch their breath.</p>
<p>I was just taken aback when the very articulate guide at a top college replied that she considered other schools “in large cities.”</p>
<p>I read in another thread, “the students at XXX college go there because they were rejected from all the ivies.” So someone that got into their last choice school probably would feel uncomfortable answering. I was really looking for an answer mentioning research opportunities, internships, Div I athletics, faculty, or the like.</p>
<p>Hanna, on our Tufts tour the young man who gave the tour actually suggested that question. He said, “Stick around after the tour and I’ll tell you my SAT scores and where else I applied.” This information was also volunteered by our guide at Earlham and Amherst.</p>
<p>A thought… a less personal way of phrasing that question could be “why WOULD you choose this school over other schools, knowing what you know about it now?” versus “Why DID you choose this school?” The answers to that will probably be more informative.</p>
<p>Our family developed a College Admissions Bingo game that we (quietly) played during tours and info sessions. It had categories for all of those standard lines we heard a bazillion times (“you can start any kind of club you want - just get three friends and a faculty advisor!” “professors here really care about students - and you can do research!” “the meal plan isn’t like mom’s home cooking but it’s not bad and we have tons of choices!”) - you could easily enhance this to include snarky remarks about your fellow tourers. (Yes, we were the family mouthing “bingo” to one another throughout the tour.)</p>
<p>I think one of the very best ways to get a sense if a school is a good fit (in addition to the school-sponsored tour) is to have your child contact high school friends/aquaintenaces that are current students beforehand and arrange to spend some time with them. Our D attended a relatively small prep, so this was somewhat easy; she at least was acquainted with these students so it wasn’t awkward to ask. We took them out to dinner (most were freshman – a few sophomores), and they personally showed us dorm rooms (which you don’t often see), the area surrounding campus (told us which eateries were good and frequented by students), etc., etc. Their answers were brutally honest because they weren’t required to sell the school. Our D asked her friend at one campus, “If you had it to do all over again, would you still have chosen ___?” Her friend replied that she loved the school and she thought the cold climate wouldn’t bother her, but she said sometimes it was so fiercely cold it took her breath away at times. Our D had this same reservation, so her friend’s comment was helpful and factored into D’s decision. Her friends (OOS schools) were all elated to see a familiar face from home and loved having someone treat them to a nice meal, so it was a win/win for everyone.</p>
<p>Toured an Ivy recently. The tour guide asked where everyone was from. One kid said his state, and the guide kept asking what town/region that was in. The kid kept just repeating back the name of his state with a semi-confused, semi-blank stare until his horrified father stepped in and said the name of their town/area.</p>
<p>So definitely know the name of your own town in case you’re asked that on the tour.;P</p>
<p>Another one for bingo: Our campus is really safe because we have a blue light system.</p>
<p>One one tour of a private university, one parent kept harranging the poor tour guide about the cost of attendence, asking “how am I supposed to afford $50,000 a year?” He could have save us all a lot of pain if he had just checked the cost on the web site and skipped the visit.</p>
<p>I agree with JC40 that the best way to get a true feel for the school is by spending time with a friend or aquaintance that attends.</p>
<p>When I toured NYU I was stuck in front of a mother daughter duo who kept talking about all the other schools she was applying to (but was OBVIOUSLY going to get accepted to, according to her mother). Her reasons for not wanting to go to Brown (WHEN she was going to get accepted): She wanted to be around “pretty” people. I wanted to shoot myself in the head listening to them. I think talking about other schools on a tour is disrespectful and makes me want to turn around and say “Well then why are you here if you love it there so much?” Most annoying habit ever.</p>
<p>In turn, I will say that my parent’s never did anything terrible on tours, although while touring Elon the guide told us about the “Greek” life on campus and my father’s earnest response was “Why are there so many Greeks at this school?” I felt slightly embarrassed but laughed a little; we’re English and fraternities and sororities are not something we were used to. Poor guy.</p>
<p>The kid went on tours with his own agenda. For example, my clean cut nonmaterialistic kid paid attention to how many students were smoking and how the students were dressed. My husband went on the tour but stayed in the background, did not ask questions, and I, the outgoing and talkative one, stayed home. I missed a lot of great trips but my kid was able to evaluate the situation without my interference.</p>
<p>ML: the interlibrary loan comment makes me crazy every time, especially since most of the parents “oooh!” and nod as if it’s impressive. When I worked in a small town, public library in the 90’s, we ILL’d for people nationwide all the time. Your public library can do that for you now. (Librarian rant now over ;)</p>