<p>Nothing close to the other stories posted here, but the other day I got:</p>
<p>D: Mom, I think I accidentally threw out my debit card
M: did you call the bank?
D: yeah, but the system wants me to type in the number on the card, but how can I when it is gone???</p>
<p>I just told her to keep pressing zero until she got a live body, all is well…</p>
<p>A call from my sister yesterday:</p>
<p>“Mom, how can I tell if my nose is broken?”
In response to the question of how my sister managed to break her nose…
“I fell in the cafeteria”</p>
<p>Only my clumsy little sister would manage to break her nose by falling down. I saw her face on Skype today. Yup, looks broken!</p>
<p>Sooooo many…</p>
<p>S1: I had a wreck. I was driving my roommate’s truck. The car I hit was a rental so the people didn’t even care.</p>
<p>S1: I got another speeding ticket.</p>
<p>Not S1’s call but the one made for him fr. the county jail: Are you S1’s Mother? Mam, you can come pick S1 up. He’s being released this a.m.</p>
<p>S1: Come get me fast. I dropped a 30 lb. weight on my toe…pretty sure it’s broken. And can you bring my protein shake so I can drink it on the way to the hospital?</p>
<p>S1: I lost my driver’s license.
Me: When?
S1: Two months ago. I just haven’t had time to get to the DMV .</p>
<p>S2: The police here say I need to go home. Can you come get me?</p>
<p>S2 (part 2): Mom, I’m at Joe’s house. Can you come get me. The police won’t let me drive.</p>
<p>S2: Mom, don’t worry if you see on TV that shots were fired. We all ran when we saw the gun. We’re all fine. It’s not a big deal.</p>
<p>Me to S2: Why are you not in sch?
S2: Well,see there were these Peacocks standing in the middle of the road…</p>
<p>From a friend of my S, one sunny fall afternoon during their senior year in HS:
“Mrs. X, this is XXXX.”
Me: “Hi, XXXX, how are you?”
Friend: “Um, fine. [Son] just went over the wall.”
Me: “Over what wall?”
Friend: “Over the wall. In front of the Capitol. With the rest of the demonstrators. And I think he got arrested. But don’t worry, he left his camera with me.”</p>
<p>Any phone call that starts with great sobs before the words…</p>
<p>Any phone calls that start with “I have a proposition for you…”</p>
<p>Thank you everyone for posting. These made my day.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>That is horrible!!! I would probably have a heart attack.</p>
<p>spideygirl, got one of those calls from S today. Classic. </p>
<p>Other fun calls: </p>
<p>S: Mom, don’t worry, I’m on my way to your office- but I need a lawyer because the investigator is with me. He’s coming too. Can someone there help me? (Note, I worked in a large prominent firm that did not handle criminal defense. Any lawyer in a storm.) </p>
<p>7 a.m. phone call: Ma’am, this is the XYZ Police Department- can you tell me when S will be home? We have papers to serve him with. </p>
<p>Senior year of high school. Good times. I love this thread.</p>
<p>S1 (from the airport on the Sunday after Thanskgiving, on his way back to school): Mom, can you check my room? I think I left my computer in my room."
Me: “Yup.”
S1: “Damn, all the assignments and problem sets that are due tomorrow (the last day of the quarter) are on it.”
Mom: “If you tell me how to sign in on your computer, you can tell me which things I can email to you.”<br>
S1: “G-d no! I’ll just re-do them instead!”</p>
<p>I FedEx’d the laptop (arrived Tuesday) and he re-did p-sets for two advanced math classes plus a SOSC paper and two weeks of German assignments for Monday.</p>
<p>Gotta wonder just what is on that computer!!!</p>
<p>12rmh18, wow, you get some interesting calls!</p>
<p>Not from S, but from the emergency room of a hospital 1000 miles from S1’s college. It was a voicemail at 4am our time that we did not receive for 2.5 hours…“we have your son here and need permission for treatment”…</p>
<p>I’m weak from laughter! Thank you all for sharing these. </p>
<p>S: I think I lost my wallet.
Me: Again?! You just replaced your DL and insurance ID.
S(cheerful voice): I only have to replace my DL, I never replaced my insurance ID!</p>
<p>D: “Hi mom, I’m over here on Nantuckett, and Joe Biden is going to be speaking. There are Secret Service guys all over the place. I’m standing right next to one of them.”</p>
<p>Me: “That’s nice honey, hope you’re having a good time.”</p>
<p>D to Secret Service guy: “Why do they call you guys secret when you’re so obvious?”</p>
<p>Me: “Honey, step away from the nice man, I’m sure they don’t like you mocking them.”</p>
<p>Oh, and my favorite.</p>
<p>D: "I’m going to a party Saturday night, the theme is “Snowpants or No Pants.”</p>
<p>Me: “Honey, you don’t have any snowpants.”</p>
<p>D: “I know.” (laughter)</p>
<p>
Me too, Packmom - me too!</p>
<p>How about -
D: Quick, Mom - what’s my Social Security number?
Me: I don’t know, and I’m not home so I’ll have to look it up later.
D: Oh, no! My bank needs it right away!
Me: What do they need it for?
D: They sent me an email and they need it for my bank card. I already told them my password …</p>
<p>YIKES. There followed an animated discussion about phishing, spam emails, scams, etc. This time (I hope) she paid attention.
And these are the worst, aren’t they? I’ve had too many of these and I’m not sure my heart can withstand many more.</p>
<p>-“So, I’m walking along and a fire hydrant jumps in front of me and I run into it with the cell phone in my pocket…”</p>
<p>We got one last week that started out breathlessly with the words, “Dad, remember that one time, you’d had a couple beers, and said how great it would be to raise chickens out back? O.K., *now Dad, hear me out … *”</p>
<p>All calls (and I’ve had at least two, so far) beginning with, "Mom? Don’t worry, I’m really okay. I’m going to put the ER nurse on now. . . . " </p>
<p>Calls beginning with, "Mrs. Welsch? Okay now, it wasn’t her back or her neck, but . . . " Only one of those.</p>
<p>And of course, “Mom, remember our car?” (That one’s cheating, because S1 lifted it from Calvin & Hobbes, but it’s how he always begins <em>his</em> interesting calls.)</p>
<p>… And I’d forgotten the calls from an unknown number when the kid was using a friend’s phone to report having flushed her own down the toilet. (Two of these so far … From different kids, at least.)</p>
<p>And thanks for the Calvin and Hobbes citation! I loved those guys.</p>
<p>Okay, this is the gist of a real live conversation. I had finally gotten son agreeable to me seeing his solo apartment- we helped him haul and carry stuff last fall and I was curious about how he chose to arrange things. He goes into his building first and then he tells me, no, I can’t see his apartment- and that I won’t want to. Huh? It can’t be that messy since he brought all of his dirty clothes home. Turns out he and his dad, who had carried a load upstairs while I stayed with the car (his dad had been the only parent bringing him home for winter break), had forgotten about the two trash bags son was going to take out as he left almost a month before. The smell was so bad that son opened windows (it was a balmy 20 something) and we went to get the perishable groceries. Oh, and he did take out his trash, too. As they say, the devil is in the details.</p>