<p>When we are somewhere (like an amusement park) and people are a) stopped in the middle of a narrow walkway to consult a map, b) running over others with their strollers, c) otherwise behaving as if they are the only people present, we say ‘be kind; they are just visiting from Planet Oblivio’.</p>
<p>My S loves to bestow the titles of Capt. Oblivious & Capt. Obvious–generally well-deserved on folks who just don’t seem to be on our planet.</p>
<p>I saw my new favorite superhero on South Park the other night: Captain Hindsight! He had an eye on the BACK of his uniform and he always knew what SHOULD have been done previously. He was useless in the present and figuring out the future though. Saw a lot of Captain Hindsights during the last political campaign season…</p>
<p>Capt. Hindsight! Love it!</p>
<p>Actual Phone call.</p>
<p>S…Mom?
Mom… What’s wrong?
S… Well, short of being dead, the worst thing that could happen to me has happened…
Mom…You have AIDS?</p>
<p>S…Ok…Well, No…the second worst thing then…</p>
<p>Well, don’t make us suffer! What’s the second worst thing?</p>
<p>Yes, please do share. What is the 2nd worst thing? Need to start preparing for these phone calls myself!</p>
<p>Well, since it’s her SON, we know HE’s not pregnant. . .</p>
<p>Which reminds me, my (college soph) D called and after giving a bunch of happy news (good grades on several tests, elected to leadership position, etc.), she said,</p>
<p>"I’m sorry that, after all that good news, I have some bad news–I hope you won’t kill me, I know you’re going to be really upset. . .</p>
<p>Mom: "Well, what is it? What happened?</p>
<p>D: "Well, um, I seem to have mis. . .placed my retainer. I just can’t find it anywhere! I was cleaning up the bathroom and I think I might have knocked it into the trash, which was already taken out. </p>
<p>Mom: Is THAT all?! No big deal. I can buy a new one for $100!</p>
<p>(The worst I can imagine? How about “I was just arrested for murder. . .”)</p>
<p>I asked my S (age 23) & he couldn’t even imagine & told me to get off CC. :)</p>
<p>And last night…“Mom, they’ve evacuated campus, its like the tundra here and I have nowhere to go! Wailll…” </p>
<p>So when I started breathing again, I get the whole story, broken water main, campus is relocating everyone to hotels, private homes or if you have somewhere else to go… was indeed bitter cold and she was scared. </p>
<p>Half the track team went to one house, they made out fine, but dont think there was much sleep!</p>
<p>^Last winter my D, who goes to school in Buffalo, called to ask if I thought her hair would break off if it was frozen onto a towel. Turns out she was in the shower that night as a fire alarm sounded and had to stand outside for nearly 30 minutes with just a tshirt, turby-twist, sleep bottoms and clogs. Silly me, I was more concerned with hypothermia and frostbite than her hair!</p>
<p>Not mine, but my sister’s…a somewhat garbled, middle of the night, voicemail from her 20 yo Marine, stationed in Afghanistan at the time: “Hi, its X. Just wanted to let you guys know that I got shot and I’ll be in Germany if you need me.” That was the whole message, and he was obviously under the influence of painkillers…they had no idea how to get in touch with him! Thank God for the Red Cross who called them first thing in the morning and took care of all the arrangements so they could be with him. He’s fine now, btw…though my sis may never recover!</p>
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<p>Well, that certainly gives perspective. I hope he’s all right. The “if you need me” will probably go down in family lore.</p>
<p>The frozen hair reminds me of two girls on my dorm floor who would routinely walk back from the natatorium (5-10 minutes) after swimming without drying their long hair- it would be rather stiff in winter.</p>
<p>When I was in high school we used to go to school with “frozen” hair and then sit in homeroom and crack it. It won’t break off, but it is fun to play with.</p>
<p>From the other side:</p>
<p>Me: “I got a 50 on my first math exam…”</p>
<p>Parents: Massive freak out.</p>
<p>Me: “…out of 50.”</p>
<p>Since then, my parents have figured out that tone is much more important than number, as often my tests aren’t out of 100 any more.</p>
<p>Although that doesn’t always work very well, since I tend to weigh my score on % of possible points instead of % of points needed. I called them unhappy about getting a 108 in physics and may have forgotten to mention it was out of 100. (Max possible score was 119).</p>
<p>My parents received a call from my school about an hour ago (as did I) that our campus bookstore had been robbed at gunpoint and that the suspects had fled on foot.</p>
<p>Not the way I wanted to wake up.</p>
<p>Son is away at school and I call him on a Saturday to get some information from him for FAFSA.</p>
<p>Me: Hey, can you give me these numbers.
Son: Well, I can’t right now. I’m not in my apt. I can call you late sunday night though.
Me: Oh, ok. Where are you anyway?</p>
<p>Son: Vegas</p>
<p>Ugh</p>
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<p>The tone does not help with a couple of my kids. In fact, quite the opposite. I once received a distraught call from my daughter (I think it was high school) and it sounded like she was saying she got a “D” on a test. Only later did I realize it was a “B”. It sounded like she said “D” and her tone certainly supported that. This led to one of those, “Are you serious? Get a grip.” conversations that parents of overachievers find themselves having.</p>
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<p>LOL! 
That’s the best one I’ve read in a while.</p>
<p>S was supposed to begin his drive home (14 hrs.) from school. He called me about 6 p.m. (still hadn’t left yet!) to say he had bad news. He wasn’t sure in what order. He was packing and sleeping on the floor of the student lounge (because his bed was loaded) and his head was just across a hallway from the door to his room which was unlocked. Someone stole his TV (boxed) and small musical instrument. They left larger instruments and his computer where they were (go figure!). It was the second time that particular instrument had been stolen (he is obsessive about his “tools”), the first time out of a locked locker. </p>
<p>Then as he was returning to the dorm to turn in his keys before heading home, someone had pulled into the drop off zone in front of the dorm, and as he drove around her, she pulled out and ran into him. He was nice and didn’t call the police because she was a new driver and he wanted to get on the road. Of course, we then got stuck with the bill because it was under the deductible. </p>
<p>Actually, I don’t remember now which piece he told me first because the instrument was more stressful for him than the car and vice versa for me. At least it didn’t prevent him from driving home–only made the door hard to open.</p>