The admitted student day caused my daughter to turn down my alma mater. It was a good decision for her.
@ts0104 I hear you about the revisit situation. Some of the schools we visited were visited over a year ago. And it wouldnāt make sense to go back except to the actual admitted student days since S19 did eat lunch with a student, go to classes, and interview on most of our visits. I think he would need the full she-bang of an admitted students day to get more out of these next visits. I just mapped out the Northeast situation and we could fly into one city and then drive to each of them if the timing could work out. It would be a lot of driving but I canāt see flying out there three different times when he may have to go back to other parts of the country too. Like your S, he doesnāt really want to think too much about his ranking of the schools and says he canāt even really do that because three of the schools he thinks he would really like havenāt even been visited yet.
Our friend took her son back to a bunch of schools. Northwestern. Then Notre Dame. Then Georgetown and they then went to Brown. The dad was just exhausted and asked if Brown could just be the school so they can buy his wife a sweatshirt and go home. The son agreed. Lol. Our S does seem to like the school he visited last the best so my husband and I have a running joke that we will figure out which school we want him to go to and then take him there on April 29th.
Iād think that by the time he gets his acceptances and merit aid info, you should work with him to pick 3 schools to revisit and limit it to that. We had a spreadsheet where schools were scored on major strength, EC availability, location, and overall vibe. Then we put cost into the mix with offers in hand and she decided on her 3 top choices to revisit. You can and should put some limits on to save everyoneās sanity in April.
@intparent Iāll just name the schools so you can see the dilemma. Of the schools we have not visited, heās very interested in Williams, Amherst, Dartmouth, and Vanderbilt. BUT, that being said, he really really liked three other schools that we did visit. Obviously, these are all difficult admits. I donāt expect him to get into all of them. I canāt see turning down visiting any of the above schools if he gets inā¦or not returning to the three schools that he knows he already likes. We are full pay and only one of his schools gives merit so money probably will not be an issue.
I donāt regret how weāve made the list. Iāve been thinking about what could happen if something crazy happens and he gets into more than one of these reaches but, as you can see from the list, they are big reaches. According to our Naviance, though, heās got a shot at all of them. I think I already said that I donāt want to count any chickens before they hatch. I faciliate between wanting to put my head in the sand and just wait and wanting to try to think April through a bit ahead of time.
My #1 visited only one college after being admitted. It was the one he hadnāt visited before. On admitted studentsā day he did an overnight and the next morning when we asked him āHow do you like it?ā he responded āThis will do.ā He turned down the 5 other schools that had admitted him. He had visited all but one of them before, and didnāt need to visit again. This wasnāt a case where finaid was a critical factor. The one he attended did offer him a small NMS award, as did one of the other colleges. He also had nice merit packages at two other colleges. But the deciding factor was āfit.ā He had found the college that was best for him.
@mackinaw. I think thatās a great story. My husband really likes to know all options before making choices. I hope that, if S19 has an early aha moment, he will be cool with us just running with it. 
@homerdog , youāll have to pray that these end up back to back. Several worked out that way for us (i.e., Amherst Thursday ?? Williams Friday-Saturday 17-18).
Ha! Ok enough about me. Donāt want to jinx anything!!!
Iām still getting a ton of info hearing about everyone elseās experiences. Itās been really helpful.
One suggestion is, if possible, buy your plane tickets to admitted students days with points. Then, if he finds āthe oneā and doesnāt want to visit others, you can re-bank the points and lose less $$. We ended up cancelling 3 trips last year after my D attended her 2nd accepted students day and said she was done ā didnāt want to do the others. She knew!
Easter was very early last year so that weekend didnāt conflict with revisits. This year itās smack in the middle of April. Canāt imagine schools would do an accepted students event that weekend. I think some schools end up offering options and donāt host everyone on the same day.
Iām torn about the admitted student days. S19 is getting hounded from some of the schools heās been admitted to about attending already. But, heās going back to 7 of his 10 application schools for music auditions and another for an āhonors musicā experience - all of them over a 5 week period starting in January. Sigh. Heās already visited all but 1, which was added on November 12 (just sliding in under their scholarship deadline), but he auditions there in January. Maybe if it comes down to 2 or 3 that are relatively equal and he canāt decide between them, he can visit. But Iām leaning 80/20 to no, that heās done.
@Katzherder I hear you; itās different when you are revisiting for auditions! I hope that you have enough info to make a decision after thatā¦thatās exhausting! My D is a Theater major and made her decision on an audition trip, and it worked out perfectly.
Great point about realizing that some planned admitted students trips may get cancelled if the student finds āthe oneā , and making travel plans that are cancellable!
Also, if youāre a planner like me and trying to scope out what possible trips might be, last year I found references to the admitted students days on official school calendars even if the events werenāt readily āfindableā on the admissions website. They they will overlap with other colleges, though some colleges have more than one, so choices may have to be made regardless of the expense of getting there.
@almostthere2018 I tried that but donāt see anything. I looked at academic calendars, events calendars, and the pages that talk about visits. Iāve also posted in the ED threads on CC for the schools to see if those kids got dates. Still missing more than half of the Admitted Students Days dates. Oh well, Iāll check back every once in a while. At some point maybe the dates will be posted on the websites.
My daughter did one admitted students event and deposited at that college. But she also had an excellent accepted visit at another college on an ordinary day. That college planned an itinerary for her which included sitting in on classes and meeting with students for lunch, as well as potential clubs of interest.
I do not feel accepted student days are any more helpful than a regular day though. In fact, they may be worse, because the college is pulling out all the stops to present the college in its best light, which is perhaps not what a regular day on campus is really like. My daughter ultimately did not end up at the first college she deposited at, because she got off the waitlist of her current college. She only visited that school once, in the summer with no students around. She knew she liked it though, and it was the best choice for her.
I certainly would not encourage people to go to great expense or trouble just for an accepted students day. My son will be visiting a college heās never been to. He has been accepted and it sounds like a place he will like. He will not necessarily attend an accepted students day because my husband will take him when it works best for his schedule. If he doesnāt like the college on a regular day, I canāt see that an accepted students day is better. We will, however, try to visit when a sports event is on, because thatās important to my son.
Some of the top colleges that compete with one another seem to coordinate their schedules among themselves for admitted student events. For example, Harvard, MIT, Caltech, Stanford schedule their admitted student days/weekend so they donāt generally conflict. Princeton, Yale each has two such events for scheduling flexibility. Colleges should have an incentive to have more of their admitted students to show up at their events so this practice may be more widespread.
I agree with @Lindagaf. We found the Admitted Students Days less reflective of what a typical day at College X looks like than just visiting after admittance. Parents also need to be prepared for kids to just be ādoneā well before the end of April. I remember my daughter urging me to cancel plane and room reservations for 2 Admitted Student events in early April - āWhy would you spend the money? I know where I am going to college.ā She was right, she had made up her mind in February, and fortunately, we agreed with her decision.
Carleton also sent my daughter an offer for some money toward airfare. It looked like a card they sent a lot of people. My daughter really wanted to go - it was probably the college she thought was the best fit for her - but $100 toward an expensive plane ticket was not enough to warrant a visit when she had great options closer to home. I know she regrets never visiting Carleton, however, even though she has no regrets about where she ended up.
My son didnāt have a great experience at the accepted students weekend for his college. His trip was somewhat curtailed for various reasons, I didnāt go with him because I had no idea I could (he had never given me any info about the event, so I didnāt know there were events for parents), and he roomed with a freshman whose room was full of bottles of booze - definitely not my sonās style. But it was the best choice for him for various reasons, and he is happy and thriving there.
Greatly impressed by the research and efforts made by people who visited many schools to select the most resonating school for them, especially the daughter of @LoveTheBard who is a Humanities Major. We purposely avoided applying to many schools to avoid the fun, hassle and the time consuming process of having to choose among several schools. Not saying he would have gotten in, but couldnāt imagine any big difference in the fit overcoming the weather and location advantages of Stanford for us. And it wasnāt as if he was interested in special program of studies such as Hotel School or undergraduate business degree or film school. But had Stanford not been friendly towards a gap year, that might have been a problem.
I sure am glad heās looking forward to starting second quarter courses and activities at Stanford ā he sure didnāt look forward to new semesters in high schools ā and says he already feels like his Stanford dorm is his home. I actually wouldnāt mind if they keep the students there for an entire year and have them come home just once a year.
Wouldnāt an advantage of Admitted Students Days be to meet some possible freshman students? And to talk with them and bounce their experiences off each other? And I think most of the schools have breakouts for parents. Listen, after all of the hoops our kids are jumping through to prove they are worthy of going to these schools, I want to see the love coming back this way with my own two eyes. Maybe some of Admitted Students Days wonāt be realistic but I bet resources are out in full swing so questions can be answered and going to class would be the same on a regular day and one during the Admitted Students Days.
I agree that one canāt always get to the school for these events and going after acceptance on your own timeline works too. Iād like to hear more downsides of Admitted Students Days, though, as I donāt really see a downside.