Long ago, I went to an engineering college in upstate NY on an AFROTC scholarship. At that time I kind of scoffed at Embry-Riddle as not a real college, but just a way to get your civilian ratings and a diploma. However, I’ve since encountered (and hired) numerous ERAU grads who have done well working in tech - both aviation and non-aviation fields. I have not seen that with the other aviation colleges except Purdue.
You’re invincible when young but keep in mind that medical issues can kill your Class 1 so have a backup game plan. Also, they’re not a factor now, but occasional airline furloughs are a thing. With that, ERAU or Purdue are the best choices.
I think you said military (at least USAF) is not what you want. That used to always blow me away; if you like planes, why wouldn’t you want to fly the most advanced aircraft in the world (inside joke, BTW). Seriously, though, you’ll do some incredible flying like approaches to no-s#!t minimums at Keflavik or watching cumulonimbus (at a safe distance) boiling up past 50,000 ft in the Andes. Airdrops in the sandbox, NVGs in mountains. Probably not going to get that instructing in a 152 or at the regionals (not that there’s anything wrong with that - it’s honest work)
On that note, ROTC can be a great option, if you can get a pilot slot. College essentially free and at the end of SUPT you can do a quick written test for Commercial Multiengine Land and Instrument (centerline restriction if you go T-38s). That is a huge step forward. Even better, you can now go directly to a Guard unit where most of the guys/gals fly for the majors. Generally you don’t have to go through regional airline purgatory; you “Guard bum” to build time, get your ATP, leverage unit connections and interview for the majors. That’s (almost) what I did: AFROTC - UPT - Herks at Little Rock - ANG. Loved it. Unfortunately, lost my medical due to health issues. Having an engineering degree made the pivot much easier. (see note above about a backup plan).
Food for thought - your mileage may vary.