<p>Your field of study will require you to study abroad for periods of time to research. The sooner you impress upon your family that you cannot limit yourself to be in NY “at all times” the better they will cope with relying upon each other. You will be severely handicapping yourself for grad schools if you tell them “my family cannot exist without me nearby.” It will be a lot easier to accept a candidate who can focus on academia and is available to travel ,study, and commit without restrictions. Don’t give grad schools a reason to reject you for personal reasons. Your mother and brother will have to learn that they will have to let you go so you can better your future. Research how many candidates Columbia takes in your field of study per year and let your family know the number is small and you are competing for less than, let’s say, 5 slots per year. Do you have the professors who will write your LORs notified of your plans? They may not remember you after a year. Have you done research? You have a lot of work to do in your year off. Good luck.</p>