Are there ANY benefits of being shy?

Pre-College Topics High School Life
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Yes, but that doesn’t answer the question.</p>

<p>The OP asked for benefits that come FROM shyness. You can enjoy the benefits of introversion and be shy, but that doesn’t mean the benefits come from shyness. That is similar to saying “Being shy makes you a good reader” just because some people who are shy happen to enjoy reading.</p>

<p>The point is, you don’t HAVE to be shy to have all these benefits. You can be contemplative, have time to yourself, and be thoughtful all without having be shy.</p>

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<p>People who are shy, tend to be introverted(at least to my knowledge, I could be wrong). Since shy people are introverted( my postulate), then they would reap the same benefits. I guess these benefits don’t stem directly from being shy, but they are advantages that shy people have(if my previous logic is correct).</p>

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<p>or liberate them from their shyness.</p>

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<p>Of course, but it doesn’t mean that all of them come from mere introversion either. People with social anxiety have a much stronger filter than most people without.</p>

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<p>It’s perfectly possible to have the benefits of introversion WHILE having proper communication skills. I know shyness isn’t really a choice, but if you hypothetically had the choice between being shy and being not shy, there’s literally no reason at all to pick being shy. </p>

<p>I can empathize a lot with shy people because I had social anxiety problems when I was a kid/pre-teen, but I worked hard to get over them. You’re never gonna get “un-shy” if you don’t put yourself out there. :)</p>

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<p>yeah this sounds right to me.</p>

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<p>Well nobody would make the choice, but that doesn’t mean there’s no reason whatsoever. Which is exactly OP’s question.</p>

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<p>All shyness means is you lack the ability to communicate effectively. To sum it up, shyness means you lack the skill of effective communication. </p>

<p>There’s really no reason to pick not having a skill (shyness) over not having a skill (not being shy). That’s all there really is to it. There are no benefits to NOT having a skill. Just as there are no benefits of having any other skill, like not skateboarding or not baseball. There are no benefits to not being good at baseball or not being good at skateboarding.</p>

<p>EDIT: To clarify, not trashing shy people. I’m just saying that if you try to cure yourself of your shyness, life will be much easier for you in the long run. :)</p>

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<p>that definition seems wrong to me. there are many extremely shy people who have been known to talk a ton, and very articulately, to those they feel comfortable around.</p>

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<p>people who are shy tend not to be considered sluts/whores/back stabbers. Not too many benefits… but there is some good to not being as outgoing sometimes.</p>

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<p>Well, if your ability to talk articulately is limited to a select few people, would that not be considered having a lack of effective communication?</p>

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<p>Shyness and a lack of communication skills are not interchangeable things. Shyness is more a matter of personal disposition, rather than skill.</p>

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No, that is introversion is the personal disposition while shyness is the lack of comfort or fear of interaction with other people, which goes full circle to my original post stating that people are getting introversion and shyness confused.</p>

<p>Although you are right - in some cases shyness can purely be internal in a way that they feel uncomfortable interacting with other people on the inside but communicate effectively on the outside. I was wrong to lump all shy people together like that.</p>

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<p>^Good point.
I know I can feel “shy” at times, but it never really interferes with my ability to communicate, as evidenced by multiple debate awards.</p>

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<p>i guess it depends on what you mean by effective communication. by what i think that means, no, that would not be considered a lack of effective communication.</p>

<p>anyway, your new definition of shyness, a fear of interacting with people, sounds better than the other one about not being able to communicate effectively. I think penguin made the distinction between introversion and shyness most clearly though.</p>

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<p>I agree that there is a difference between being an introvert and being shy. I’m neither of those, but both my husband and son are introverts. Both used to be on the shy side, but you would never know this from talking to either of them. There’s a great book out called “Quiet” about the power of introverts, which I’m reading to better understand introverts/my husband and son. Many great leaders in society were/are introverts, including Lincoln and Bill Gates. Unfortunately for introverts, we live in a world where extrovert traits are valued - being confident, well-spoken, outgoing, and gregarious. So many introverts learn to be extroverted when they need to be in order to succeed in life. But as the author points out, the world needs both introverts and extraverts. Most great thinkers and creative people are introverts. Check the book out - it’s a good read for introverts and extraverts alike.</p>

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<p>^I remember hearing about that book from some early morning news show .</p>

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<p>I’m an introvert getting over my shyness, I suppose. It was positively crippling in middle school [especially after I moved in the eighth grade and lost all my old friends]. I guess I’ll second what other people are saying–shyness will not get you anywhere. You have to be open and assertive. The loudest people, the ones whose opinions are heard, are the ones who get their way.</p>

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<p>there is an interesting article at a Wm and Mary Gifted site that I like about how introversion can be associated with academic giftedness. It doesn’t talk about extroverts not being gifted. Instead the article focused on how there are many extroverted teachers in the primary grades who like high contact with students are charged up by being outgoing all day…and sometimes this personality trait in a teacher doesn’t “get” the more introverted child and their future contributions and gifts just yet. It is a kind of obtuseness about the range of giftedness in teachers. </p>

<p>This can be challenging in elementary and earlier school years when teachers tend to value extroversion in their students (who speaks up and emotes the most is rewarded.) Extroverts tend to get charged up with high contact with others while introverts are refreshed by some time alone. </p>

<p>All students in your college class are gifted. One Bell chart I saw indicated that the higher your IQ, the more “different” from each other your gifts (and your differences and weaknesses) will be.
This makes a little sense when you think about the high school classes that were taught to the “middle” of the class. </p>

<p>Think good thoughts about your future at Vanderbilt. No, you will not become the biggest social butterfly out of 1600 students. But you are now going to live on campus where you are encouraged and expected to single-mindedly pursue YOUR interests, which are night and day different from most of the people on your hall. Even your professors have specialized single interests and talents and they do NOT resemble each other either. College is a place where some qualities of introversion get to really shine and have a strong place. </p>

<p>Freshman year can be exhausting as you must do your best to appreciate your classmates, hear their stories, remember details about people you meet and teachers you come to know. So many new people to sort out and to come to know better over time. But as the years progress, you will enjoy your uniqueness more and more. </p>

<p>Best secret it to recognize the unique gifts of each of your freshman hall mates, and enjoy following them on their searches and journeys --while pursuing your next best version of yourself.</p>

<p>Start to read up on shyness more. Think of yourself more in terms of having a more discriminating nature, and respect your need for taking things socially a bit more slowly. </p>

<p>Anyone your age knows how they would like to be treated by older adults during these crucial years of 18-23, as works in progress. One skill you must have is to parent yourselves in life. Treat yourself with the same loving care and respect for your shyer nature as you would treat your own son or daughter who might start out in life with this character trait. </p>

<p>College is full of turnarounds, breakthroughs and change. Even ridiculously extroverted people sometimes take time off and dig in to a more introverted period of life, study and socializing. </p>

<p>congrats on your admission! Vanderbilt had 25 thousand applicants and they chose you for a seat in this class because you are part of what will make the place “tick”</p>

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<p>I am shy and have always been shy. I care way too much about what other people think of me. Junior year was a huge breakthrough for me. In terms of shyness, I graduated from the “complete social outcast who has two friends” to the “hey, I actually have a group of friends and am acquaintances with almost everyone I meet” stage. I still struggle with talking in large groups and talking to people older (like 5+ years) than me… also, intimidating people.</p>

<p>Benefits of being shy:
Well, I always noticed that people seem to think that you need a pity party if you’re shy. :wink: I’ve had people in school who I don’t know come up to me if I didn’t have any friends in the class and start talking to me and ask me if I’m okay. A few of them actually ended up being some of my friends. I’ve been told that once I open up to someone (which happens over time), I don’t shut up. :stuck_out_tongue:
^^ Not sure if that’s even a benefit, lmao</p>