It has nothing to do with the “package,” but rather the cajon es. A guy can have some real pain from sitting with his legs closed tightly together, and I might add that the pain doesn’t instantly go away when the pressure is removed.
With that said, I find the way a lot of men sit to be ridiculous. A very slight “manspread” can be a biological necessity, but sitting with ones legs at an almost-90-degree angle is just a ploy to hog more space.
I love EarlVanDorn’s advice. Paying attention, EVD!
Last year DH & I were flying from Europe to the US. We were seated in that awful middle section, I gave DH the isle seat so he could stretch his long legs. On my other side sat an enormous, not obese just enormous Russian weight lifter. He was with a team of weightlifters flying to some kind of an athletic competition. As we sat waiting for takeoff, his body just expanded by the minute, taking up more and more of my space. Usually I don’t mind this too much because I’m petite and fit pretty well into most airline seats. But this was going to be a 10+ hour flight, this guy was Russian (and they often DRINK. Heavily.) who promptly took off his hoodie under which he wore nothing more than a kind of tank top. Eww.
It was shaping up to be an awful flight. Until a miracle happened: there was a mechanical problem which forced all of us to deplane and be rescheduled for another flight. Once back in the terminal, my husband went to the United desk an turned on the charm. Quietly, with a smile, and total understanding for the difficulties the flight agent was facing, he told of my predicament – of my seat being engulfed by a giant Russian weightlifter in a wife beater shirt. (OK. He didn’t really say that last part.) He gently asked for our seats to be reassigned - if that were at all possible - once we had a new plane. The agent laughed, said she’d see what she could do.
The end result: UPGRADE to business!!! I kid you not, we flew home in style, sleeping sweetly in almost-beds and feted with champagne and Belgian chocolates.
Bless that Russian weightlifter.
@katliamom, lol, I was feeling sorry for you and then…no. 
Lucky train of events!
I’m not quite sure about that, squeezed next to a hunky Russian weightlifter, or business class. Tough choice…
I once got rebooked into a center seat on a flight from Cleveland to Seattle. We were travelling with 3 young kids and ended up all in center seats spread over the airplane. I walked toward the back of the plane, saw my seat, and did my best not to express my horror. A very large mother and daughter had booked window/aisle and only about 6" of my center seat was showing between them.
Luckily, I have narrow hips. The D stood in the aisle while I sat down, then she did her best to wedge herself into the remaining space. I spent the next five hours pressed between them from knees to shoulders. Given that they smelled clean and were nice, I have to say, after my initial panic, it was a rather pleasant flight swaddled in warm softness. Russian weightlifters would have been torturous.
Manspreading is an attempt at social dominance, not a physical imperative. Next time you see the NFL commentators all standing around, check out the competition on who can keep their feet the farthest apart. If RuPaul can tuck his business and sit with his knees together, so can anyone.
^Like an airbag in case of severe turbulence?
The thing about manspreading is that they don’t do it when sitting next to another man, it’s only when they sit next to a woman. I’ve made a study of noting on the express bus what the same men do when seated next to women or other men and it’s pretty much universally only when next to a woman. The worst part is when their feet are spread out, too, so there is no floor space for the person next to them to actually put their feet on the floor. I generally stomp on their feet.
“Given that they smelled clean and were nice, I have to say, after my initial panic, it was a rather pleasant flight swaddled in warm softness.”
@Magnetron – way to make lemonade!
It’s more comfortable. Though I try not to do it when space is cramped, on a bus or something when there’s no one next to me I’m using 1 and a half seats.
“The thing about manspreading is that they don’t do it when sitting next to another man”
I had a young guy do some serious manspreading next to me on a flght once. Seriously, the widest manspreading I’ve ever seen, like he was practicing a yoga pose. His knee was way into my space, like up to the halfway point. Being a guy myself the man code dictates that you can’t let things like this go, so I crossed my legs and rested my shoe on his knee. He moved his leg. No words were exchanged in this silent display of dominance, which we repeated several times during the course of the flight.
That’s hilarious, anomander
You know, it’s funny. I’ve never noticed that manspreader thing. Part of it may be that I generally fly first class, or at the least, have an exit row or economy comfort seat, though that may not give you a wider seat, just more leg room in front. I also tend to keep my legs directly in front of me, or crossed, so I don’t take that much space. If it bothered me, I’d probably pull out my flight bag, and put it into that space. I don’t know if that would work, if someone is particularly aggressive, however. I’ll have to watch for that.
Well, I suggest women who are well-endowed or wide-shouldered adopt a woman-spread for these types of seating issues. They should always be allowed the arm rest so their breasts are not sore from being squashed together for a whole flight as they round their shoulders to fit within the width of the seat.
I had a guy man spread into my flight space once. He was pretty tall and we were just crammed in. I felt sorry for him since it was more a case of his knees needing room.
I also felt like I couldn’t read my book without him reading over my shoulder! Not that he was nosy, just that it was so crowded that you lost all of your privacy. Thankfully it was a short flight!
I’ve witnessed manspreading on the subway, mostly. Once I asked a young man to stop doing it–I and the woman on the other side of him had each lost half our seat–and he launched into a tirade of personal insults, implying that I was too fat to fit into my seat, which I can assure you was NOT the case. I said, “It’s a matter of common courtesy” to which he replied, “In NOO YAWK???” What a boor.
NY now has posters against man spreading in the subway system. Also posters against using the poles as stripper poles! The video below is funny.
“For economy, one checked baggage - a inches and x lbs, one carry on bag, b inches and y lbs, and one passenger - c inches and z lbs …”
greenwitch! Thanks for that link!
Manspreading is not because of the private parts or anything like that, it is that men have a tendency to ‘fill the space’ they are in, I haven’t figured out if it is cultural or instinct. There are some women who do that, but it is rare, because women tend to shrink themselves into a space IME (women on the other hand do other impolite things, on trains and buses they put their bags on the seat next to themselves, and then when someone indicates they want to sit there, give the person dirty looks and make it obvious they aren’t happy; these are rush hour service, when the trains and buses fill up, but they seem to think they have the right to use their bags to 'maintain their space").
As far as planes go it is going to get worse, to fit even more seats in, aircraft may have even narrower seats so they can fit in an extra seat in each row.
My wife travels a good bit and it happened to her again last week. She was seated next to an armrest lifter, i.e. someone so obese that they could not fit inside the armrests.
I would have zero problem telling the guy that the armrest had to be down and if he didn’t fit he would just have to get off the plane. But my wife simply will not say anything because it would “embarrass” the seat thief. And that’s what the airlines are counting on. They refuse to enforce the rules designed to protect the passengers, even though they are aware that most passengers are too shy to make a scene. And of course, once the airplane door is closed, all hope is lost.
It wouldn’t be hard for the airlines to police the armrests to make sure they remain down. Whenever I fly they are able to notice if my seatback is reclined so mucy as a tenth of an inch. If they can manage to force everyone to raise their seats then they can also observe whether the arm rests are down. We need a federal regulation with substantial fines for failure of the airlines to enforce the armrest rule.
IS there an “armrest rule” to be enforced?
I remember waiting for a flight home from London. A morbidly obese man entered the waiting room, and I figured I had just seen my seatmate in coach for a 9 hour flight home. I am typically very compassionate for people with weight problems. I know it is not always just a matter of discipline and self control. But I was very anxious about having no room in my own seat for such a long flight.
When we boarded, I was so relieved to see him take his seat in first class. I felt bad for him, but at the same time I couldn’t help but be glad for myself. It’s definitely not a positive aspect of traveling these days.