I hear you!
I was with Kaiser for a long time, but then one of my kids needed rare eye surgery and Kaiser had only one surgeon in all of SoCal who had any experience with it at all and none with infants (age of my kid) and refused to send us to UCLA where their surgeon had much more experience with this surgery in general as well as for infants. We ended up paying UCLA ourselves and it definitely left a bad taste in my mouth.
I switched out of Kaiser a few years after that so I could have a wider choice of specialists.