<p>I know that it is a very personal thing, most of the aspies I know wouldn’t like to do what I do, I was just sharing my perspective. Your son is more the norm, but public service and advocacy is my special interest and public speaking kind of work is okay with me because for the most part I get to speak in monologue and none of the awkward conversational issues I have in group conversations are relevant. I am too oblivious to be shy, to be honest, so this kind of stuff is suited for my unique make up. I wasn’t trying to say that all aspies are like me, on the contrary, I was trying to show that we come in a lot of different packages. My experience has been that people don’t get that. </p>
<p>And, unfortunately, people see what I can do and they overlook what I can’t do. I am only managing to live on my own in the dorms with supports from my parents, university staff, and my boyfriend. I don’t know if I could do it alone. I forget to eat and sleep. No matter how hard I try I still haven’t mastered getting up on my own-- even with three or four alarms and sleeping on hte floor so I can’t get too comfortable, I’ve tried everything I can think of. I can’t make my own medical appointments reliably, I get confused and end up hanging up with no appointment. I have finally managed to learn to grocery shop but I end up having to go back to the store every day because somehow I messed it up, and I have severe food allergies and essentially have to be able to cook from scratch to feed myself. My executive functioning skills are crap. I can’t drive on the expressway or take the bus without going into sensory overload and/or having a panic attack, and I have no one to help me with that so I have no idea how I’ll get to a job if I should ever find one. There are serious problems here. I’ve held jobs before and I think I could do very well in a job as long as I wasn’t required to become best buddies with my coworkers, but whether or not I could keep myself alive to get to work is questionable. Which is a shame, because it feels like I am so close to being able to do it, but somehow without help I always make mistakes I shouldn’t still be making and things get messed up. I get just wanting to function. I exhaust myself to the point that I have to consider dropping out of school every semester just to get by. But nobody sees that because I am articulate and can dress myself and with extreme concentration can occasionally pull off only a semi-awkward conversation. </p>
<p>I understand why you don’t want to focus on the vaccine issue, and that is one of the reasons why I don’t approve of the “certain organizations” I mentioned before who I feel are using scare tactics like this study. There are wildly popular organizations which collect funds to develop a “cure” when really their focus is on developing a genetic test, propagating vaccine bullcrap, and hardly any of those funds ever actually make it to families that need help. If they want to do those things, fine, but call it what it is. I think it diverts attention and funds away from studies that could be developing accommodations and therapies to help those of us who are already autistic function, which is what I strive to do in my own service work. On top of all this other mess, I am sure you have noticed the alarming lack of support or even reading material for autistic ADULTS. It’s as though people think we never age into adults, almost all of it is for kids (and males). These kinds of problems are major issues that get overlooked in favor of sensationalism about vaccines. And whether it is rational or not, I do think some parents feel the need to have something to blame-- maybe they feel guilty (for no legitimate reason, of course), maybe it makes them feel more in control, I am not sure, for some reason I don’t know they cling to the study. But my belief is that more focused needs to be placed on 1) actual legitimate science, and 2) actual helpful therapies, rather than bogus vaccine studies. So the more articles published pointing out the lack of validity to the vaccine claims, the better in my view. Because that shouldn’t be the focus, and too many people are clinging to ******** and missing their chance to actually make changes. Maybe I wasn’t clear in my posts or maybe I am misunderstanding you, but I am not sure what you think I am not seeing.</p>