<p>I think the difference is this: helping me did not mean she worked a say over 65. The help I am providing my children means I will. Two reasons: Isherwood was 26 when I was born; I was 36 when my D was born and 38 when my S was born. And she worked 18 years for a pension that allowed her to retire at 3/4 of her salary for life, whereas I’ve worked 28 years for a glorified IRA that will allow me to buy pencils for life. I really think for many of us, it’s a bigger sacrifice to help our kids than it was for our parents. Not to say I don’t big time.</p>
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<p>It does but you have to weigh the costs and benefits and your energy levels before taking something on. Having other outlets (like the great diet and exercise thread) can dissipate a lot of negative energy.</p>
<p>Compromising and accepting, but still don’t like it. Nothing leaking anywhere, thank you very much. Discussing and venting here because I thought it was relevant before the conversation turned into marital advice for me. </p>
<p>I can be more rational about inlaw situation than H can. Very hard to say “no” to kids or parents, even if one really should.</p>
<p>BCEagle - it does feel interesting! Despite these modern problems (which I share with many), I consider myself incredibly blessed.</p>
<p>The silver lining may be that each year of early retirement reduces life expectancy by two months. </p>
<p>[Why</a> early retirement may not be good for your health | Marketplace.org](<a href=“http://www.marketplace.org/topics/life/freakonomics-radio/why-early-retirement-may-not-be-good-your-health]Why”>Why early retirement may not be good for your health - Marketplace)</p>
<p>Another one of those “correlation pretends to be causation” arguments. Dubner’s almost as good at them as Gladwell.</p>
<p>I have not doubt I could use my time just fine–I don’t need to be paid to structure my life–I have lots of things I can be doing. And I get more exercise and eat better when I have time to get those things right. </p>
<p>Sorry, back to your topic…</p>
<p>Yeah… post number 24 sucks…</p>
<p>I might try early retirement anyway…</p>
<p>My family is right up there in importance in my life. I have dreams and am retiring for awhile, at least from my current position. My friends and family who have retired are more busy in their current life then they were going to a job. Change does the heart, mind and spirit most good!</p>
<p>P.S. My “greatest generation” parents were retired for over 35 years and they had a good time for as long at it went almost to 100.</p>
<p>momof2, I’m sure your H’s generosity of spirit extends to you, too. :)</p>
<p>momof2, when you write that check, say, “At least, thank God, this helps them to NOT come and live with me!” That would be unpleasant, to say the least, that they burned up their money, your money, and now are living with you.</p>
<p>“The silver lining may be that each year of early retirement reduces life expectancy by two months”</p>
<p>It depends. The life expectancy in my job is age 64. So I think early retirement probably extends my life by decades. If only…</p>
<p>I think the point is that it’s not the retirement that’s detrimental but the loss of physical or mental structure. Note the study by the psychologist observing that most retirees after a flurry of activity settle into becoming couch potatoes. It’s hard to be self-disciplined at any age, but I’m sure if you spent your retirement walking the Appalachian Trail, writing a book, or going back to school, you’d be fine.</p>
<p>“It depends. The life expectancy in my job is age 64. So I think early retirement probably extends my life by decades. If only…”</p>
<p>That is really low…</p>
<p>Why?</p>
<p>I have a tennis friend that retired two years ago - he was a medical doctor. He has homes in Paris and New York and New Hampshire and his wife is a college professor in Boston. He plays tennis regularly and is very skinny, muscular and fast. He’s on a few boards too. He’s very careful about what he eats (vegetarian, low-fat, organic), and he lifts from time to time too. I think that he has a long life ahead of him. He’s very active, busy and keeps himself mentally stimulated.</p>
<p>^^I don’t think they have it figured out yet. My guesses are something to do with alternating day/night sleep cycles, lifestyle choices (I have seen many people gain too much weight over the years, seems that where you live makes a difference in that), exposure to radiation and hazardous materials, 10X the usual rate of brain cancer and melanoma. Many people don’t pay attention and just keep working extra, but it sure catches my attention.</p>
<p>@busdriver</p>
<p>Recently, while traveling, my wife and I met a retiree at a motel, who had taken on a new job of delivering school buses from the factory. He loved the free travel, open road aspect of his new job, and we thought it could be a cool thing to do as a couple–although my wife, bless her heart, said she prefer driving Maseratis cross country for bicoastal rich people.</p>
<p>I agree with your wife, go for the maserati!</p>
<p>Busdriver11… Interesting…</p>
<p>I can see where everything you mentioned can impact longevity.</p>
<p>One reason I left a trading floor was I saw what you wrote…
A very unhealthy place…
My wife’s best friend died of cancer in her late 30’s. I saw other traders get cancer…</p>
<p>One of the reasons my husband left medicine was because he felt the stress was so unhealthy. His boss at the hospital suggested meds: “That’s how everyone else here deals with it.”</p>
<p>I think that sealed his decision at that moment.</p>
<p>There are some really stressful jobs out there, I can definitely see medicine and trading being some of them. I’ll bet plenty of people deal with it through medication, as garland’s boss suggested. Probably the last thing people need to do. I guess you just have to make the best choice for yourself. It is a tough balancing act, do you give up the money, or at least some of it for lower pressure jobs or less work. We’re always struggling with that aspect. It’s not the stress, but the fatigue.</p>
<p>And now boomers keep working to help their kids and their parents, maybe working themselves to death to do so. Nothing wrong with working hard, but at some time it would be nice to retire!</p>