<p>“I really don’t see why so many people here are so judgmental and cold.”
That is exactly what I meant when I said judgmental and callous.</p>
<p>Okay, just to be clear here–she is not in a vegetative state. Nor is she analogous to Terri Schiavo. This is a different situation entirely. Opinions can differ, but understanding of the basic reality seems germaine. It’s not cold to recognize that.</p>
<p>It’s true I did not start every post with, “This is very tragic.” That doesn’t mean I don’t feel badly for a family that lost a child. But how I do or don’t feel is irrelevant.
I also understand the hospitals very evident exasperation with this entire situation. And, it seems we all agree on the expected outcome. So it’s semantics.</p>
<p>Sorry, garland. And I don’t think you’re cold for pointing out my mistake in terminology. :)</p>
<p>“That’s not being cowardly, it’s recognizing that the cost of letting them continue to try for a different outcome for another week is small in the context of what’s at stake. (That, incidentally, is the legal standard the judge is supposed to follow.” Reiterating this.</p>
<p>Garland, I recognize that there is only one outcome. But again, I have a problem with the judgment leveled against this family and the flip manner in which some posters have addressed it. Also, I think that the legal system has to be applied without regard to the popularity of a position and in full observance of the law.</p>
<p>Zoos–I understand that legal rights are being contested. I just think that that is a system that is acting in a way totally divorced from physical reality. Which is maybe not an uncommon thing.</p>
<p>But, when you talk about her “care,” you are assenting to the basic re-defining of life and death here. It’s horribly, unimaginably sad, but “care” is beyond her now.</p>
<p>edit to add: obviously, I mean “care” in the healthcare, attending to, sense, not the care about an individual sense, which will go on long after death.</p>
<p>Flossy, it isn’t semantics. It is tone. Some of your posts have been very ugly. You even specifically denied the need for compassion in favor of your view of reality.</p>
<p>How is this going to be different by delaying a week?</p>
<p>Care is not beyond her. One can provide care to a piece of art or a dead relative being prepared for burial. </p>
<p>Where would you draw the line in deciding where the law shouldn’t be applied?</p>
<p>No, it’s not my view of reality. It is at least 3 medical professionals view of reality.</p>
<p>And, I do think reality matters much more that a stranger’s compassion, obviously.</p>
<p>Sevmom, perhaps the family cited case law setting a relevant precedent for giving time for the family to make arrangements. I don’t know. But the judge does and I see no reason to believe that he is either corrupt or cowardly.</p>
<p>No flossy your view of reality of whether this family is deserving of compassion or whether their circumstance is silly.</p>
<p>That is not at all what I said but if you want to think that, whatever.</p>
<p>I’m not going to argue what’s law; I’m arguing what, in my opinion, is ethical. Lines for law are defined by statute, I guess, and then after that what calibrates them is some odd stew of wishes, opinions, money, politics, fear, and wisdom.</p>
<p>Probably not enough of the latter.</p>
<p>What you said, flossy, was “ugh, compassion again. How about reality.”</p>
<p>It is cases like this that cause discussions to be held and clear standards set for the next time. That could be a positive outcome to this horrible situation.</p>
<p>Exactly! But what I meant was that you seemed to be looking for me to say more about how tragic and heartbreaking this was rather than dealing with the fact that we have a family hoping for a dead child to come back to like. It’s frustrating.
Dragging it out is not compassionate. IMHO.</p>
<p>Flossy, I picked up on the exact same tone of contempt zoosermom did. As she said, it’s ugly.</p>
<p>I think they should leave everything in place as is and cardiac death will happen eventually. If she accidentally extubates, or she gets pneumonia, or her other organs fail, so be it. That spares the family the pulling the plug moment without prolonging this to extraordinary lengths. Continue minimal hydration, ventilation, and hygienic care. No antibiotics, no blood transfusions, no resuscitation. My sympathies to the family.</p>
<p>Wow, nobody here has said a judge was corrupt or cowardly.</p>