Good news: There are certainly admitted students at Exeter (and peer schools) that have grades and stories like yours!
Bad news: There are also students who have grades and stories like yours and are denied admission.
The advice to cast a wide net is very wise and not a reflection of you or your strength as an applicant. It is an accurate picture of the landscape of competitive admission at schools today. You sound like a great applicant and any school would be lucky to have you. There are a lot of students (and parents!) here who have done this before who are happy to help and answer any questions you have. Good luck this admissions cycle!