I’d say this. Find schools you love. If your parents really say - we’d spend $400k even if we could spend $100 or $150k, even better.
After visiting, if you really love a school it’s ok to apply. You have 20 common app spots. As long as you have two affordable safeties you won’t be upset having to attend, it’s ok to take your shots. If you love UNC, then no problem. Many who love UNC love UVA too. Or others W&M which is more Mines size.
You needn’t get in everywhere. And while UNC is brutal OOS, you can’t get in if you don’t apply.