I am sorry to hear about your mother. Since you have a lot on your plate, you may want to streamline this process for yourself by considering how best to reach your goals.
I would encourage you to prioritize Questbridge. Since your brother was a finalist and went on to Vandy, perhaps he can shed some advice about that as well as the CSS portion about the NCP.
You ACT score is in the 95th percentile overall and probably even higher considering your SES and URM status. So take that into account.
It looks like UKY awards scholarships based on stats. They encourage early apps for the scholarships, so get that one in quickly.
https://www.uky.edu/financialaid/scholarship-incoming-freshmen
You can consider the regional universities in KY as super safeties. Is there one within commuting distance?