Chance my child for GWU/American/BU/BC/Emory/UMD/Tufts/UCONN/UMASS

That’s what we’re thinking. If we stretch ourselves and spend money and that too for a kind of major she is going to…Somewhere in her mind she has plans of Law and it’s going to be too expensive with the loans for that. So we’re planning to just support undergrad and let her take loans for Law school.

As I mentioned in previous post, I think she’s probably not able to meet the expectations and feeling little underconfident.

I totally get that. My only concern even if we stretch ourselves, if that’s going to be worth as she still not 100% sure what she’s going to do and also she doesn’t like to discuss. If it’s something that she knows for her and that makes her land in a good job right after that, we can try to afford or take some loans.

It’s a hard decision based on the current situation and her major.

Richmond - I am sure about the diversity factor as I mentioned in my other post and the other I am sure there won’t be much diversity.

Thanks for your input.

This makes me feel little bit comfortable but do you think it makes any difference being an OOS student for all these colleges?

My kid just got into American regular decision with lower grades, but a 32 ACT and decent ECs. 4s and 5s on 3 AP exams. Had a great essay. Demonstrated real interest in the school, including a visit. $10K merit. I think your daughter is a real candidate, but she needs to show that they’re a match. Suggest checking out UVM which gives out significant aid to OOS.

Change your expectations of her.

Lots of schools have >10% Asian student population. Is that ok for you or you want more? Also is this a requirement from your student or from you parents?


There are plenty of opportunities in the Midwest/outside the east/northeast for IR and some schools have already been mentioned: Denver, Croft at Ole Miss. What is the home state?

I agree that AU and GWU may be attainable but she does have to show interest. Beyond visiting in person which is best, she can do a virtual admissions session and other panels they might have. Also make sure to open the emails they send and click on the links. I know it’s a silly game, but important for those schools. Run the net price calculators at all the schools on her list, and if they look affordable, I would suggest considering to apply ED at AU or GWU. I don’t think UMD will be affordable. UMass and UConn probably won’t get there either, but better chances on those.

I’m going to make an outside the box suggestion, which is: have you considered a gap year? I ask this based on my own personal experience with my son, who was somewhat similar to your kid. He did go ahead and apply to (and get into) a college he was excited about during his senior year of high school, then asked to defer his admission for a year, and took a year off to explore, grow, have some new experiences. (I’d be happy to message you with more information about my kid, and what he did during his gap year if you’re at all interested.)

He started college as a freshman last fall, and is benefiting so much from having taken the extra year. He’s more academically motivated, more mature, and more able to handle curve balls. His year off was fantastic, gave him a much-needed break from school, while at the same time enabling him to regroup and really get excited about college. I’m so proud of him for being willing to take a risk, and do something that not everyone else was doing.


I’m sorry to hear about the difficulty you’ve been having to get the college search process on the way. Does your daughter want to go to college? Or want to go to college directly after her high school graduation? That may be part of the issue. Alternatively, is it possible that she feels the family is always trying to discuss college/the future? I know that @sbinaz has found that limiting discussions to 15-minutes once a week with an assignment to do sometime in between has been helpful to get her daughter engaged.

If your family is earning more than $200k, it is unlikely that you will be receiving much in the way of need-based aid. Thus, it will come down to merit aid and lower sticker prices. Based on what you’ve indicated, these are some schools your daughter may want to consider:

  • Binghamton (NY): About 14k undergrads, 16% Asian. Sticker of around $45k and they’ve been trying to attract more out-of-state students.

  • CUNY Baruch: About 16k undergrads, 34% Asian. Sticker of around $34k.

  • DePaul (IL): About 14k undergrads, 12% Asian. Sticker of around $59k but gives generous merit aid.

  • Indiana: About 34k undergrads, 8% Asian. Sticker of around $52k.

  • Loyola Chicago (IL): About 12k undergrads, 13% Asian. Sticker of around $65k but gives generous merit aid.

  • Ohio State: About 47k undergrads, 9% Asian. Sticker of around $51k.

  • Rutgers – New Brunswick (NJ): About 36k undergrads, 31% Asian. Sticker of around $48k.

  • Temple (PA ): About 26k undergrads, 13% Asian. Sticker of around $52k.

  • U. of Georgia: About 30k undergrads, 11% Asian. Sticker of around $42k.

  • U. of Massachusetts: About 24k undergrads, 12% Asian. Sticker of around $53k.

  • U. of North Carolina – Charlotte: About 24k undergrads, 9% Asian. Sticker of around $34k.

  • U. of Pittsburgh: About 24k undergrads, 12% Asian. Sticker of around $50k.

  • U. of Wisconsin – Madison: About 35k undergrads, 9% Asian. Sticker of around $53k.

Fordham and Syracuse would be two other schools to consider, but they are probably reaches in terms of getting them close to your budget.


We went bonkers on DI with AU - and the max I saw was $25K but we got $15K - and chose Charleston over it.

When I say bonkers - admitted student day, dad opened the emails, played the videos, various webinars, etc.

With its lower than ever acceptance rate - not saying it’s not a possibilty - but won’t likely hit the cost.

So worth a shot to OP - but again, they need a definite price achiever.


Another possible school to consider is George Mason, literally just outside of D.C. in Virginia. About 27k undergrads, 22% Asian, and a sticker price of around $52k.

ETA: And a few more ideas:

U. of Minnesota - Twin Cities: About 36k undergrads, 11% Asian, and a sticker of around $47k.

Virginia Commonwealth: About 21k undergrads, 15% Asian, and a sticker of around $50k.


You shouldn’t move for this reason. A girl who is unmotivated for schoolwork and college applications (although she isn’t doing too badly, from what you describe, although you don’t mention specifically what last semester’s grades were, and how her grades are running this semester), and who has friends who are not bad people, just who are similar to her in not being motivated about schoolwork, is not going to be helped by a move. She’s not suddenly going to become the top student in a new school with all new friends who are all highly motivated top students! She’s far, far more likely to become socially isolated and seriously depressed in the new environment, and be online/on the device even MORE with her old friends.

You aren’t going to get fin aid, if your income is over 200K. It is not worth paying double for an OOS public, or triple for a private college in this situation. Your best bet, by far, is staying put, and having her go in-state public. You can sit down with her and have an honest discussion (assuming that both parents are on the same page). Does she want to go to college? No? Then she will begin working right after high school, and pay you room and board (which of course you’ll save for her, without telling her that); in fact, she could begin with a little part time job now, that will become a full time job this summer, and you take a high proportion of her earnings to help with room and board, leaving her with some pocket money. If she’s driving a family car, that money goes to pay for the increased insurance, and the gas. I really hope you haven’t bought her her own car - if you have, then add in the car payment, too. If the answer is yes, she does want to go to college, then she will go to the best in-state school she can get into, with the deal being that she gets ONE semester to prove herself, get decent grades, and if she doesn’t, she transfers back home, lives at home, and tries the nearby 4 yr state college or even community college that has a transfer agreement to the 4 yr college (hopefully flagship), to go back with her Associate’s degree. She doesn’t do the work there, while living at home? Back to the step of working while living at home and paying you room and board. Don’t nag her, don’t harangue her - just state the facts. If she has a sudden transformation, and works very hard, and gets straight A’s this semester, and starts assiduously prepping herself for the ACT/SAT, then fine, you can pivot back to the college search and readjust your plans. But from what you’re describing, really, almost none of the schools on your list are appropriate for a child who just doesn’t seem interested, and for a family who is likely to be deemed full-pay.

I understand your dream, that if you move her, she will suddenly metamorphose into a highly motivated, hard-working, high-achieving student who gets into a top US college and goes on to a high-powered career, earning a great living. And she might yet eventually, but right now, you have a girl who won’t even discuss school/college/studies. STOP planning the impossible dream, start dealing with the reality in front of you.

UConn is less likely than UMass. UConn has become very selective. UMass would probably take her, maybe without merit money. Lots of S Asian students there.

If she’s going through a stage where she doesn’t see the benefit of hard work in school, so be it. In the US, we have many, many opportunities to get serious about education. It’s not like other countries, where one is tracked beginning at age 12, and it’s very hard to move up academically after that. She may just take a little longer to grow up. But I would most definitely NOT plan a move based upon trying to get her away from her unmotivated friends - it’s very likely to change nothing, and even more likely to make the situation a lot worse.


We already did and conveyed that to the child.

From both

@Mwfan1921 , could you please elaborate on this? I didn’t get you

I meant in terms of meeting your desired net COA.

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@AustenNut , Unfortunately I think we stopped discussing about college at all but she doesn’t share much or open up to discuss what she wants and what she doesn’t want. These are all based on earlier discussions. This year she is not ready to discuss but she updates us about few of her friends where they got etc sometimes.

I think this is a mostly a safety school and close to our home.

Most of our school goes here

We have this in our list and I heard good things about it.

We’re considering this too.

I have this in our list.

I don’t think she can get into this.

This is also mostly a safety school and is in our list.

Thank you so much for your time. Are any of these high reaches for her?

I thought they are in mid 50s.

I mentioned the Charlotte campus, not the Chapel Hill one. Chapel Hill would be pretty unlikely, but Charlotte would be within reach. I don’t think any of the schools you just mentioned would be considered high reaches.

If she’s trying to be on the eastern seaboard, I’d also really recommend she look closely at Binghamton. I think it will have a lot of the elements that you’re looking for.


Honestly, it’s not that she is not motivated about college especially being a student from South Asian family. It’s just that she is not liking much to discuss about that. At the same time, she has high expectations (I mean decent colleges like BU, BC and GWU) for a college and in-state is her last option. She wants to get out of this place too.

She had 2 Cs in 2 APs, 1 A in a AP and the rest are Bs. She said she couldn’t manage some of her assignments when everything was at the same time for regular classes and she lost points because of that. These days, I am afraid to look at her grades as I am getting too tensed and unable to take the stress myself.

I am not saying that or dreaming about it. All I am saying is, she can manage the subjects. She is just not able to manage too many things at the same time. I know college is stressful but she doesn’t have to deal with 7 subjects and can also take only what she likes etc. I know, she can do well without stress. It’s not that she is not interested in studies/college.

I agree. It’s not the only reason. We have a another older child in NY so want to be closer to both and at the same time she can explore more opportunities and she is also interested in East coast colleges from earlier discussions.

Yes, $57K for UConn and $55K UMass (based on 2023-24 prices, so plan on a year of cost increases for 2024-2025, and thereafter each year). I had thought the budget was ideally in the neighborhood of $45K?

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Pittsburgh is not a safety for your student. I’d say target.