You might need a combination of hooks to get in, write an essay that absolutely knocks everyone’s socks off, do something heroic in the next eight months that gets you 15 minutes of fame… something (or some things) that makes up for the sub-Ivy GPA and test score.
Ivies do let in a handful of low-stat kids each year – check out the scatter plots – but there must be something else to make up for those low stats. They’re not going to reject many 1600/4.0 applicants, who worked very hard to achieve those stats, to let in low-stat kids without something that the schools need (a big hook or multiple hooks) and who haven’t achieved public acclaim.
All that said, the only way you have a 0% chance is if you don’t apply.