@wjp007 You sound like a great parent who is doing everything right, and your child sounds like a high achieving student, so I don’t think you and your child did anything ‘wrong.’ You and your child did everything you could toward a certain goal, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but it sure does hurt when your child is hurting, and it will probably take a while for the pain to subside for both of you, and nothing wrong with that either.
Your child sounds like a high achieving student who will thrive at where ever he decides to attend. All your efforts of helping him navigate this morass is not for naught because it will help him in other areas of his life. College admissions is such a random thing, and just because he did not get into a dream college does not mean anything. Some schools just have too little slots for too many kids who are the right fit, and I’ll bet those schools would love to enroll all of them, but are limited by available slots.
When we were looking at schools, we liked the vibes/student body at the University of Rochester (and also super cold, like Chicago lol) and Brandeis too (smaller in size, and some people say their campus is looking a little run down, but we were more interested in the student body and the academics). Those also aren’t safety schools either, however, but maybe worth a look.
I guess the point is that trust that it will all work out for your son and you. Your son’s ability to achieve so much along with your guidance already means success, and with his qualities, he’ll be successful no matter which school he attends.