“I don’t know any woman over the age 50 that buys magazines that feature beauty tips or focuses
at all on the body.”
In an email loop, some friends of mine and I were complimenting another woman on a particularly pretty green dress she wore at a certain event. I’ve shared pictures of an outfit I’ve picked out for an event with a younger friend who is an amazing stylist because I wanted her tips on how to style it. Honestly, the idea that once you hit 50, you shouldn’t worry about beauty tips or your body profoundly depressing. That’s how you get cat-sweatshirts at PTA meetings.
I’m kind of unclear why there are so many comments about not wearing full faces of makeup. I don’t think “caring about beauty” = “having a full face of makeup.” I know I wear a lot less makeup than I did when I was in my twenties - most days I wear just eye pencil, lip gloss and a dash of blush. But to me beauty also implies taking care of your base skin - so I’ve started using good skin care products. I am fortunate in that I did seem to inherit good skin and was taught to stay out of the sun - so maintaining that good foundation and keeping my skin in good shape seems to me just as much about beauty as layering a bunch of cosmetics would be.
Agree with you, Pizzagirl. A small comment - makeup is not about health. As a chemist, I hesitate to smear some of those ingredients found in lipstick etc. on my living, breathing skin - especially because they have no useful function other than alteration of appearance. I wear minimal makeup once in a blue moon when it would not be PC not to do so. But I am lucky that I don’t interact with customers or big corporate clients on a daily basis - I stare at chemical structures most of the time. I can see why someone in Pizzagirl’s role would have to wear makeup (I was told a story that a MSFT exec would buy a new pair of CL shoes every time she had to travel to Moscow on business - because when in Rome…).
Skin care products are a different issue. I do not hesitate spending $$$ on good skin care products and using them. Blocking the harmful UV rays and keeping moisture in are critical measures for keeping the skin healthy. And so are good nutrition and hydration.
I also do not understand why some folks think that “inner beauty” cannot coexist with healthy, strong, tastefully dressed body. As if dressing well and exercising to keep the body in shape would make the person instantly dumber.
“Our standards are really low if we think that a middle aged woman (or a fat woman or a woman who has survived breast cancer or…) posing in lingerie is worthy of applause.”
When it’s a middle aged woman whose entire career has been based on her physical beauty, I do think it’s “daring.” I mean, not heroic in the sense of rescuing a toddler from a burning building, but I think it takes guts for someone in her position to reveal herself unretouched, knowing that she’ll be subject to lots of critique and scrutiny.
I’m the one who started the makeup tangent. For me, I have always been interested in the contrast between male and female standards of body acceptance and beauty. Just a fancy articulation of " How come women paint and spackle and men don’t." I feel like painting my face is a tacit acknowledgement that I am not acceptable barefaced. Even with the new marketing of cosmetics as “skin care” , the emphasis is a beauty standard. My face is just my face, good days and bad taken as they come. My value as a person has to be more than eyebrows, liner, and plastic wrinkle-filler, right? If I am more than my face, why do I need paint? Seriously, I just think too much My mom is a lipstick fanatic, my SILs full-face every day people, my friends, etc…
I’m a lover of cosmetics, although I wear them differently now. No more base makeup, I used to love that but it just settles in all the fine lines and pores…now just tinted moisturizer. I still wear all the stuff on my eyes, but put on differently due to aging eyes. No more dark burgundy and red lipsticks…now picks, coral pinks and light brownish tones, maybe a neutral…always with some sort of gloss. I could hang out for hours around a cosmetics counter.
I have one friend who almost never wears makeup…not one bit. The only time is when she attends a party with her husband, and then she wears it lightly. Liner, mascara, neutral shade, lip gloss. It is very light and natural, but she is enhanced. She gets compliments all evening long how pretty she looks that night. Her best features just come forward without a lot at all. But, she thinks it’s a hassle the majority of the time. I don’t understand that attitude, just as she doesn’t understand why I don’t like to quilt. LOL!
I do a lot of good stuff- treadmill, yoga, skin care, sunblock, eat healthy. I will still never look like I did when I was 25 or even 40. Which is fine.
But I am interested in fashion and do wear makeup. Color my hair and got an eye lift.
D is a fashion and cosmetics addict. I can think of no other way to describe it. I can’t imagine what she spends on clothing and cosmetic products. Probably every penny she has (and some she doesn’t). I like nice things too, but my vices are things like running shoes and handbags.
I have been blessed with good genes. People are usually surprised when they learn I am over 50. If I had continued with my unhealthy habits of my early twenties (smoking, drinking, sun worshiping) it would be a different story. I do think women feel a different sort of pressure than men do in terms of appearance.
“I’m the one who started the makeup tangent. For me, I have always been interested in the contrast between male and female standards of body acceptance and beauty. Just a fancy articulation of " How come women paint and spackle and men don’t.” I feel like painting my face is a tacit acknowledgement that I am not acceptable barefaced. Even with the new marketing of cosmetics as “skin care” , the emphasis is a beauty standard. My face is just my face, good days and bad taken as they come. My value as a person has to be more than eyebrows, liner, and plastic wrinkle-filler, right? If I am more than my face, why do I need paint? Seriously, I just think too much My mom is a lipstick fanatic, my SILs full-face every day people, my friends, etc… "
@greenbutton you are my hero
I don’t wear make-up either, for precisely the same reasons, and it always makes me feel so good to meet another woman who feels that way.
" If I am more than my face, why do I need paint?"
Following the same logic, why would anyone use deodorant, brush hair, shave, etc.? Unlike brushing teeth, these activities have no underlying health-related reasons.
To me, there is a difference between changing/enhancing what you look like vs. just maintaining a neat appearance. Brushing hair doesn’t really alter how you look. Deodorant is really not to cause discomfort to others (I wouldn’t wear it if other people magically didn’t mind BO). Make-up changes what you look like, even if it’s just slightly. That’s just my logic personally - “what you see is what you get” - I look no different at noon then when I first get up.
Properly applied makeup does not “change” your appearance; instead, it simply highlights your best features, as conmama said. I do not see anything wrong with that - even though I personally don’t wear makeup daily.
It enhances you then - makes you look better artificially - that’s what I don’t like about it. Again, that’s just me. I have no issue with anyone who wears make up, but for me personally, I have a problem with enhancing my appearance through artificial means.
And if you think “societal pressures” to beautify oneself exist only for women, you are highly mistaken. My hairstylist says that when she worked at a beauty salon downtown, more than 50% of all manicure clients were men. Lawyers like to keep their claws sharp, don’t they?
" I have a problem with enhancing my appearance through artificial means."
You enhance your appearance through “artificial means” without even thinking or noticing it. The hat you wear to protect your head from the elements makes your face appear slightly different, the teeth your dentist patched are no longer “natural”, the light reflected off your clothes makes your face look darker or lighter, etc.
But, as you said, we all have our personal preferences. It is all fine as long as we don’t try to proselytize our philosophy and don’t think less of someone simply because she is wearing (or not wearing) makeup.
What’s the primary purpose of those items you referenced, BB? To enhance appearance? I would say no. What other purpose does makeup (that is not primarily a skin care item) serve?
In my limited geographic sphere it would be the rare male who felt they needed a manicure - even the attorneys I work with daily. Whereas most of the women I work with and socialize with wear makeup and get mani/pedis. I’m sure larger metro areas are different and of course trial attorneys are another breed entirely. I think men get away with “letting themselves go” with a lot less criticism or judgment than women do.
I can see why someone in Pizzagirl’s role would have to wear makeup (I was told a story that a MSFT exec would buy a new pair of CL shoes every time she had to travel to Moscow on business - because when in Rome…).