Found the thread I was remembering! Lots of helpful info here, though remember girls’ recruiting starts and ends earlier than boys because of the differences in physical maturity. http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/athletic-recruits/1291234-college-recruiting-tips-for-soccer-p1.html
For a middle school player, just keep options open. That means keep playing (as long as he loves it) and look for opportunities to improve without driving the pleasure out of the game. My D3 kid started doing overnight camps around 8th grade because 3-4 days of intense soccer was his version of paradise. Try to avoid listening to the hysteria and drama about clubs, coaches etc.
It is a big commitment, we generally heard that D1 Men’s Soccer is around 40 hours a week in season. D3 is less, but still a big chunk of time – my kid generally spends 25-30 hours a week in season and 10-15 hours out of season. Good luck!
Editing to respond to some other questions that had been raised, which I just noticed on reviewing the thread. On Academy vs. “regular” club teams – maybe find out more about whether the path to your Academy closes after the initial 13/14 entry way? Is there movement from the “regular” highly competitive club teams onto the Academy teams at age 15/16? Perhaps look for advice from families with older players who have navigated this process, whose judgment you trust. I’m a planner and a relentless researcher by nature, so a recruiting service seemed silly to me. For a player looking for admission to a top 50 university/LAC, I don’t see the value of outsourcing the process, but that’s just me.